I am not sure if it is a growing sensitivity that I have as I get older or if it is a renewal of my sensitive nature that I squashed as a young child in order to protect myself, but the more awake and alive I attempt to show up in the world, the more I am impacted by what I see and experience. There is a sensitivity to the energy that is in spaces in between people, the breaths in between thoughts, and the silence in my connection with God. I used to think it was a sign of something wrong. As though this in between space meant not enough was happening and trouble was looming. I can see where I have experienced this in my life, especially at a young age. Now that I am willing to let go of my childhood reality and step into a mature relationship with reality (at least the best I can), I can tolerate the in betweens, the pauses, the silences. It is a discipline developed from my daily prayer and meditation date with God. It doesn’t mean I fully accept it but I am less alarmed by it. I am more likely to believe that it is possible that the in between might bring about good as well as challenges. It makes life more breathable. More than anything I know in my heart that the in between is God unseen and unheard but nothing can erase God. God waits patiently for me to look to the side or up or refocus my eyes. I am the one who can writhe my hands in frustration or want to get out of it, but I see now that is a protection device. There is ebb and flow to everything and the moments in between the ebb and the flow are just as precious and necessary as the two sides they bridge.
dailydatewithgod 
Leave a comment