dailydatewithgod

Life strikes me as a process of undoing and unknowing as much as one of learning and embracing new understandings. We are not aware as we grow up how much has already been infused in our sense of who we are and what we believe.  We simply take it for granted.  We see ourselves as who we are.  There may be some recognition of familiarity with those we have spent most of our time versus those who are new to us, but there is not necessarily a recognition of what that means.  A belief is a repeated thought. Whether it is something we were told growing up or a circumstance that caused us to create a particular perspective, we are infused with beliefs.  The infusion is where we derive our sense of self.  But this sense of self is largely based on circumstances.  The circumstances of which family and culture we were born into, what kind of early interactions we had with others, and what those in authority told us we were.  The infused information that we have taken on as our definition of self comes from outside of us.  This does not mean we need to abandon it completely.  It means we are given the opportunity as we mature to look at what has been infused and determine in our hearts if it is still true.  Maybe the circumstance no longer exists.  Maybe the people who taught us had no other options.  Maybe it was only meant to take us so far.  We know which infused beliefs need to be brought to question into the truth of who we are at heart because they are the ones we keeping batting our heads against.  The infused beliefs that somehow are no longer working.  Honestly, it is only when my infused ideas (like: I am doing it wrong, or it is not enough, or it is my fault, I am only as smart as school says I am, or the best way to keep the peace is doing what is expected that) began to break down, that I was willing to see what was true within me as well as outside of me.  It is a life long process which God has taught me on our dates to handle with gentleness and compassion both for myself and those who played a role in infusing them.  When I focus on how many beliefs or simple ideas could potentially start breaking down I get overwhelmed.  God assures me that I do not need to search them out.  The more I connect with my own heart and discover the truth of who I am some will just fall away.  Some I will want to hold on to and will fight letting go of. All infused ideas and beliefs have served a purpose which has brought me to where I am today.  All can be held in gratitude whether or not it is meant for them to stay or go.