dailydatewithgod

We all have our preferences.  We know what we like and what we don’t like.  We have a predilection for a particular food, musical genre or artists, ideas and beliefs.  Some of our predilections are strong and seemingly unmoveable.  We are so inclined to a certain slant on something we are not able to adjust and see things from another angle.  These biases are present in all of us.  On my daily dates with God I see how I am being steered to pay closer attention to the predilection of my heart.  I can name off the top of my head what in my mind is a predilection in whatever category.  It is not as accessible when it comes to the predilection of my heart.  Especially since the predilection of the heart is usually just within the context of the moment I am in.  I may know where I am inclined or intending my heart energy when I walk into a situation but none of us knows all of what we will encounter. Circumstance may cause something I had not prepared for to be presented.  What I have learned is that if I practice tuning into the awareness of my heart I am more likely to be aware of the heart’s predilection when it comes time to make choices.  God has shown me the choices that reflect the truth of who I am are the ones that come from awareness and incorporation of the mind and heart’s predilection in the moment.

In a world that appears to place a higher value on the complexity of our minds versus the simple pure energy of the heart, it is easy to use one to buffer the other.  Sometimes we get stuck in thinking so much about something we cannot solve.  We are certain that if we think about it long enough we will figure it out.  Many times we have to step away from it, invite our heart into pondering and then we find ourselves with a solution we could not think of before.  If we have been taught to buffer the feelings of our heart because they get in the way of the power of our logical minds, we do not see this as possible.  We are not robots or Vulcans.  We are logical but even neuroscientists have found that there is so much more than logic that goes into the everyday workings of our minds when it comes to decision making.  Keeping a buffer between the heart and the mind may be a seemingly way to prevent us from being hurt but it rarely works.  The distinction is getting that our hearts have greater courage than we realize.  When we pause and breathe and let go of the buffer what we find is the resources we need to move through whatever hurt may present itself.  Letting go of a buffer that seems to protect us allows us to connect to this courageous power and utilize it to inform our minds of what we are truly made of.  God encourages us to release the buffer through our breath and open ourselves to get acquainted with the whole of ourselves.

The longer I live the more I see the power and the easily missed importance of the spaces in between.  The moments experienced between the exhale and the inhale.  The time on the way to somewhere when it seems like nothing is happening.  The space between people or objects. The path in between the two choices. These are all examples of power in the midst. Our minds do not value them though we benefit from them whether we are aware of the value of being in the midst. The midst speaks the language of our hearts which echoes the need for there to be a between.  A pause happens in the midst.  A moment to gather oneself happens in the midst.  A point of insight comes in the midst of doing something else.  When we slow down long enough to hear and feel the power of what happens in the midst we learn to appreciate it.  The midst is like the music in between the notes.  God whispers to us in the midst.  We find ourselves simply being in the midst.  At a time when many people are being asked to slow down, it may feel like we are only in the midst.  We may have spent a fair amount of time resisting it and feeling like it was purposeless.  Maybe it is about taking the midst as an opportunity to become reacquainted with how our hearts can navigate us in the midst.  Navigate us to get to know more of the truth of who we are.  Then when we are called to be more active we will respond from the midst of our hearts alongside the intention of our minds.

All of our systems are set up for survival. It is so inherent to our nature and therefore not something we have to intentionally activate because most of it happens without our awareness.  There are particular instincts in place to make sure we are driven to get what is needed and protect against what may hinder our survival.  Our brains are mechanized to have all of this going on without any input required on our part.  It is a marvelous system and I for one, am extremely grateful.  It is what spurs super strength, resilience, and courage in difficult times.  While we may find ourselves right now in such uncertainty of how it will all turn out, we do have the capacity within ourselves to survive it.  Yes, the reality is some people will not be alive at the end of this pandemic and many have already been faced with this.  The reality is at the end of any period of time there are a number of people who are not physically with us who used to be pandemic or not.  There will also be new lives that emerge during this time. Life is what survives and tapping into the reality of that in our own lives is the courage we need to show up and face what is in front of us each day.  God invites us to be in the survival flow of life.  Connecting to our hearts enables us to see that when we are present in the moment we are in, who we are being the only survival tool needed.  Who we are in our hearts is something that is not limited by physical presence. Connecting with the strength and resilience stemming from the energy of our hearts will give us what we need however it looks physically for us today or tomorrow.

After what seems like a lifetime of thinking that perfection is what I am supposed to be aiming for in life, I find myself confused about new conversations around failures and flaws. I hear things about how it is good to fail and fail fast.  And while I know I have never achieved a level of perfection in any area of my life I have always been drawn to the idea.  It sounds safe which I realized after much soul searching was what I was really looking for.  Given that failure meant I was not approved of and therefore not safe, what else was I to choose except to either be or appear to be perfect in as many ways as possible.  Again, not like I achieved this supposed perfection.  Besides, I noticed along the travels of life that the perfection level seemed to change at every turn.  Perfection like beauty was in the eye of the beholder.  The bar kept getting raised and if I got close to what I thought it was, another who seemed to know what they were talking about did not see it as perfection.  It left me wanting to give up before I started.  On my daily dates with God, I began to make room for what I call the flaw of perfection.  Two things, in particular, stood out to me upon examination.  One is that nothing or no one is perfect all the time. The other is that God made us perfect just as we are so perhaps the drive to perfection is a calling to return to the truth of who we are.  The truth which originated in us long before we stacked up the stories of how we were not perfect enough and proceeded to prove otherwise.  The flaw in the perfection is the ridiculous value we place on something we think we need to find or become.  The flaw of perfection is embracing that at our core we are as perfect as we need to be.  The flaw of perfection is that it is too simple to be real according to a mind that is constantly calculating what is wrong with everything and everyone.  The flaw of perfection is that it is, in fact, the facing of our flaws that brings us back to our hearts which reminds us of the perfection residing deep within us all along.  So like my nightshirt says, Flawsome (adj.) – an individual who embraces their flaws and knows they’re awesome regardless. 

When they talk about the concept of flow part of what is happening is a complete absorption into the moment.  We become so focused and in tune with what we are involved in our sense of self dissolves.  We are one with the experience or the person whichever it may be.  The concept in terms of performance in the world of athletics or business.  The funny part is flow is something that spiritual leaders have been living and speaking about for ages.  Now we have scientific data to back up what is happening in our brains and os in the western world this means it must be true. 🙂  Yet no one has to explain to a child that when he or she is absorbed by a task or activity they are captivated and learn more from it and probably will want more of it.  No one has to tell lovers they are absorbed in their attention towards each other and that is creating the flow of love between them.  Absorption certainly happens in our minds but it is the light in our hearts which keeps the energy flowing through our bodies which allows us to know intuitively we are in the flow.  Without the heart’s involvement what the brain is doing to stay engaged will only go so far. God has shown me on our daily dates that as I am willing to spend time in the quiet of my heart, the more I will notice moments throughout my day in the absorption of that same energy. Meaning more moments of flow because the heart’s absorption means I am being more of the truth of who I am in the moment.

When we are faced with challenges labeled as problems or perplexing situations because they were unexpected.  In my adult business life, I have learned a little bit about learning to expect the unexpected.  Of course, the application of this idea goes way beyond business.  And, of course, there is no way to completely know the kind of predicaments we will be faced with in life.  I have come to know from my daily dates with God that my ability to handle predicaments comes from a level of acceptance.  An acceptance that is readily present in my heart but is not so evident in my mind.  With brilliant imaginative capacity, my mind can spend endless hours creating arguments and justifications as to why a predicament should not be happening.  Everything from the plain old idea of knowing I planned better to complete dismay over how such a predicament could even occur.  None of this imaginative apparatus while impressive at creating stories does much to be able to face the predicament as is.   My heart has the courageous capacity to hold the space of acceptance of a predicament while allowing my mind to still not like it.  It is not about getting our minds into agreement or understanding as it is to assist it in being able to be present with what is. No one wants to find themselves in a predicament, although in hindsight we are often grateful for them.  Our hearts give us the capacity to hold on and be with ourselves and utilize the skills we have and learn to develop by facing the predicament as we travel the road to the side of hindsight.

A lot of what is going on in the world right now is an uptick in the level of individual and collective grief.  We often think that grief is specifically experienced with the death of a person but we can also lament the loss of many kinds of things.  There is a lament about lack of social gathering, canceled graduations, weddings, funerals, seeing coworkers face to face, hanging out with friends at school, and so much more.  The lament is real and is important to notice how it affects our hearts.  We can feel weighed down by it or overwhelmed.  It can drain our capacity to handle ordinary circumstances.  God invites us to embrace the lament instead of discounting it or justifying why it is unreasonable.  Making room for noticing how it affects the state of our hearts will allow us to see our capacity to be connected to people, places, and things.  I recently thought about how I do not know when the next time there will be a dance happening.  Whether in a club, dance lessons in a studio, or seeing dance performed.  I deeply lament the idea that dancing in public would be absent.  Yes, we can dance in our homes and I certainly do dance around my apartment but the shared experience of touching and moving in the rhythm with another human being makes my heart sing. I lament the absence of that and while in comparison to losing a close friend to the virus it seems irrational, the comparison is not important.  By making room for whatever lament we are experiencing allows us to be present for whatever deeper experiences we will also lament. I give myself permission to lament the loss of groups of people dancing together.  I also lament when a patient in our hospital dies of the virus and may even lament not being able to watch the upcoming Top Gun movie when it debuts this summer.

When we are operating in the world we may not be aware of the spectrum of light we are emitting.  We are just doing our thing.  The hue of our energy may be out of our awareness.  It is not until we notice the reaction of others that we are present to the hue we are in. The spectrum of light that travels in waves through us into the world colors everything we see and impact the hues of others.  Sometimes we are not able to see the full spectrum because the hue of the person painting the picture for us is the dominant one.  We notice the contradiction of hues when we find ourselves in disagreement or conflict with another.  The place of peace that God invites us to start with connecting to the hue of our own hearts before we respond to the perceived hue of another.  I know it may seem cumbersome and like a lot of work to first connect to our own hue but knowing the spectrum of light we are residing in gives us the breath of compassion and understanding to add value in an interaction with another.  Sometimes without even knowing it, I find myself wanting to react to what I perceive as a dark hue emitting from someone else or an idea and all it is meant to do is tell me of the dark hues I am carrying within my own heart.  Other times it is about speaking up to that person and asking them to address their own dark hues before they use them to color the world around them.  Only when I connect to my own heart and am present with my own hue that I can attempt at making the most out of the gift of another person’s hue.

Often times we find ourselves thinking, believing, and behaving in a world created from someone else’s vision.  When we stop to look at how our lives have shaped out, we have no clear sense of why we were heading in a particular direction.  It is usually when the vision we are living in keeps coming up against friction.  Sometimes that friction is that we find we can no longer garner the energy needed to show up and fulfill the picture we are living into.  In those moments, life invites us, often through pain, to stop and take a look at the vision.  It does not matter where it came from or who formed.  It may not even matter why we were attempting so hard to live into someone else’s vision.  What matters is choosing a revision.  The revision could be similar but with our own style.  The revision could be a turn in a completely different direction.  The revision could be a midpoint between what we have been doing and what we aspire to be. The revision by definition is a vision that is redirected.  The redirection is not where it is going but where it is coming from.  The revision that is life-sustaining and the one from which we have unlimited energy is that which stems from the vision of our hearts.  It is not simply the vision of our minds.  The revision from our hearts enables us to dance through the ups and down, to take twists and turns, and see ourselves as being who we know ourselves to truly be on the road to creating the vision.  The revision of our hearts makes way for being the gift we are no matter what vision we are living in or living into.  Connecting with the truth of who we are in our hearts starts with our breath.  When we hit the friction it begins the process of revision because we are forced to stop and take a breath.