dailydatewithgod

We like to think we know exactly what we want.  Why is it once we get it we are still not satisfied?  Why is it we are ready to focus on the next thing we want?  Is it really the thing, person, or experience we are seeking?  Everything around us tells us so.  If we get this car, that job, are in a relationship, or obtain an accolade then we will be what?  Secure? Fearless?  Settled?  Successful?  Happy? Are we seeking a way out of the drudgery of the human experience? I never fully bought into the idea of getting the car, the job, or the house as a sign of success.  My goal while not conscious was to get the approval of others.  I figured if I followed the rules, did what was expected, and didn’t rock the boat I would somehow feel like enough.  I would be able to justify my place on the planet.  Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how one looks at it, it pulled me from the truth of who I am almost to the point of total destruction.  In recovery, I learned the form I am seeking is not what my heart is seeking.  There is nothing wrong with having the car, the job, the degree, the boyfriend and so on.  It is when I make those forms the be all end all of what is important about me.  The forms are important because they propel us in a particular direction. However, if we let our hearts and souls guide our journey, they will often take us farther and deeper past the form into an experience of greater depth and power.  My drive to prove I was worthy of taking up space on this planet led me to destroy myself and hide my heart.  This led me broken down into recovery which opened a door to a whole world I did not even know existed.  It brought to me the idea of my daily dates with God.  It showed me a way to be in the world where I did not have to be afraid of the form I had taken and how I could change what I thought about me and others.  If I had gotten the love and approval I desired by my actions and in the form I expected, I would have missed out on what it is like to know I approve of me and I love myself because I AM.  I would never have known the precious heart understanding that because God gave me breath, I am here where I am supposed to be.  The form I wanted would not have allowed me to know that to have a truly open and present heart means making space for all forms and seeing the love within them.

On any given day we are presented with a multitude of choices. Most of those choices already have meaning attached to them.  Do I see my anger as an indication of something trying to get my attention or something wrong with my state of mind?  Do I think I am good for ordering the salad for lunch or bad? Is there an end to this uncomfortable situation at work or will it last the rest of the week?  Should I ask a question or not say anything at all?  Red or pink?  All of these choice points are presented to us through the lens of the filters we have already built-in.  From the filters we discern what is most appropriate in the moment.  For some elements our minds have made a decision long before we are even aware of it.  We like to think we have much more say in some of our decisions than we do. So much of our choices are made automatically.  This is good on some level because to really have to choose at every choice point would be exhausting mentally and emotionally.  But for some things we want to make it a point to use some perspicaciousness.  It may require a pause, a breath, investigation of further information, asking a question, seeking another person’s perspective, or choosing not to make a choice.  Discernment is similar to judgment but it is less automatic. Being perspicacious means taking the time to consider things instead of just going with the first thing that comes to mind.  We all judge, this is not a surprise.  The question is do we take the time to be perspicacious.  On my daily dates with God taking I am sometimes asked to look again, to discern, on a decision I made previously.  God is not standing there with a gavel condemning me for being judgmental but an open invitation to be perspicacious. A chance to use my heart to further evaluate the effectiveness of my judgment.  To look clear-sighted and see if it was made automatically from my programming or if I took the time to be aware of what I was choosing to do.  The gift of perspicaciousness is the chance to make decisions as a whole person-body, mind, and spirit.

When we make decision it is powerful.  Our hearts push out the tenacious energy needed to stick to what we know to be true down to our bones.  Sometimes when we find ourselves faltering it is because either we did not wholeheartedly make a decision or we made a resolution instead of a decision.  The tenacity required to sustain a commitment is what carries us through when we begin to doubt.  We wonder if it is worth it. We don’t feel into it anymore.  We question if we are really meant to do what we set out to do or be. If we are longing to embrace the truth of who we are being in alignment with how we show up, tenacity is required.  Who we are at our core is not some carbon copy of others.  We are not meant to follow a pattern so we look and act like everyone else.  We are designed to be messengers of love. The particular expression of love meant to come through us is not always going to look like it does for others or what is considered to be acceptable.  God does not ask us how we are loving like expected.  God asks us if we are loving from who we are.  We are given guidelines through spiritual paths and religious practices but love expressed in the moment is what counts.  The tenacity to be the love in the moment takes courage and cannot be expressed except by those present in that particular moment.

I resisted using a GPS system on my phone while driving for a long time. I am the gal with the AAA maps in my car and the Thomas Guide book for Southern California because I was going to figure out what direction was best and how to get there.  Those however, do not provide traffic updates or alternatives that are not easy to see especially while actually driving.  There is a certain surrender in being given direction to follow that is both freeing and frightening.  Do I really know where my GPS is telling me to go?  Is the directions I am being given really saving me time?  My GPS cannot seriously expect me to make a left turn here during rush hour?!  There is no way . . . and then there is.  Taking direction is welcomed in some areas of my life but not in others.  Usually my resistance to direction whether from God, an inner inkling, another person, or my GPS system is due to fear.  Fear of where following it will take me and if I will be safe.  Yet there are times when I will catch myself blindly following the direction of someone or something else without a thought on my part.  Somewhere in there is a balance.  Our heart carries within it the direction of the core of who we are designed to be.  Within our hearts are the directions to love.  When we pause and check in with our hearts anything we are receiving from outside, we will know which direction to follow in that moment.  The best direction much to my chagrin is usually one that comes a step at a time.  My head wants to know where I will end up but my heart is right here, right now.  It is my heart that knows when it is a good idea to take the path of love that leads me to make turns I didn’t know I could and see places I have never been or to go ahead and take the freeway because it is the highway we are all on.

There are all kinds of things we react to in life.  Most of what we do is automatically react.  It requires a level of mindfulness and presence to choose to act in a situation.  Many hours of our day we don’t actually need this skill but when we do we are so used to operating out of reaction it feels foreign to us to not do just react.  The choice to allow something to spur us to something else is a choice we can make.  God encourages us to notice what is automatically spurring us to action and how we might want to make different choices.  When we pause, take a breath, check in with our heart we might make a different choice.  We may not.  Recognizing and claiming our capability to choose what is spurring our actions in life may seem overwhelming at first.  With practice and on my daily prayer and meditation dates with God I see the benefits of claiming my ability to choose.  Instead of the responsibility feeling like a burden it is freeing.  With time I have come to see that others ideas, behaviors, or experiences cannot spur me to anything I do not choose to be spurred by.  Therefore, no one else is to blame.  Which means I can change if I want. I cannot change what is outside of me. Connecting with my own heart and balancing the spurring of my mind is a step into freedom with each breath I take.

No matter how much of a self-starter or go-getter we are sometimes we just need a boost.  We need people and a way to remind ourselves of how powerful we are.  Those who know us and love us are usually more than willing if we ask to lift us up.  Especially if they know how much we need it.  The key is the vulnerability to ask for what we need.  It takes courage to ask for secours.  It take a moment to humbly recognize we cannot do it on our own all the time.  The beauty of the human design is we can begin the process with ourselves.  If we pause and take a breath, it is the beginning of secours.  The very breath we take to be honest with ourselves about what is going on.  The breath we must take as we choose to humble ourselves and ask for back up.  In the breath which is within us is the opportunity to create secours as we garner further determine what kind of assistance we need.  God designed us to begin to cultivate what we need within ourselves.  Not so we can do it all on our own.  So we can have the courage to engage with others.  Our breath is the opening portal to secours.  On my daily date with God I am given the secours I need to remember throughout the day that God does not leave me when our daily prayer and meditation time ends by starting with my breath.  In turn it gives me the courage to be the secours for someone else I cross on my path in the coming day.

One of the fundamental elements of a mindfulness practice is in honing the ability to observe.  We mindlessly observe things all day long.  Our eyes never stop.  Our senses never cease taking in information.  Some observations become more consistent.  Others are fleeting.  It is the ones we find ourselves observing over and over again that we pay attention to.  The Buddhists and others teach of non-reactive observations or what is sometimes called being the silent observer.  One of the purposes ideas is to get to a place where you have no reaction to what you are observing, especially something you normally react to.  Another idea is to find yourself wondering who is doing the observing.  We create space when we pause within moments of observation where we can choose what to do if anything with what we are observing.  Everything is a choice.  We may not choose what our eyes fall upon what we do choose whether our attention stays on it.  We can observe with curiosity, contempt, or question what we are observing.  It is not the observation that is the difficulty.  It is what we make what we are observing mean.  It is easy to think our observations are the full picture because it is all we have in the moment.  Judging by how many court cases have been overturned that relied upon eye-witness testimony, one might be reluctant enough to make us rethink the validity of our observations.  Like all things it is an opportunity to check the eyes in our head with the eyes of our hearts. Before our minds run out the door with meaning attached to an observation, we can pause, take a breath, and check in with the observations happening in other areas of awareness.

Sometimes we are not aware of what our life is trying to tell us.  We get stuck in literal physical experience and forget there are all kinds of underlying experiences happening.  Energy is fluid and it moves in waves.  If we are seeing life as solid objects only, it is easy to miss them.  It is kind of like air which is present all the time.   It is always there but we often do not notice it until it is strong enough to move something physically. As we go through the day there are indications of energy that is not seen by the eyes.  We are much more apt to say we sense it emotionally or spiritually.  We feel as though there are indications of something beyond what we are seeing that is happening.  For some reason because it lacks a physical indication we do not give it credit.  Energy is energy.  We are so wedded to what our physical eyes can see that we rely on them entirely.  What about the eyes of our heart?  What about all the other faculties of awareness God has given us?  If we can hear it or feel it is it any less valuable of an indication?  If we begin by paying attention to indications in whatever form they present themselves, we can expand the view of our lives.  God invites us to utilize all the faculties we have at our disposal so as to experience the profound possibilities in any given moment.  On my daily date with God I do not see God but I know God is present.  In building a relationship one day at a time I have enough indications of the existence of God to satisfy the eyes of my heart whether or not I can see God with my eyes.  Even so, when I remember we are all made in the image and likeness of God and there are indications of God’s creativity all throughout existence, how can I help but see God everywhere?

It is kind of funny how we can seemingly know other people better than we know ourselves.  It is part of how we create relationship when we pay attention to others.  We design an interconnection aside from one that is inherent to show we belong together. Some of our connections with others come without our consent such as family, culture, gender, or skin color. When you add those elements to how we show ourselves to the world we are believed to be more suited to certain a particular job, type of people we hang around, our likes and dislikes, our beliefs and ideas and more.  Sometimes these are correct.  Our ultimate suitability is what is in alignment with our hearts.  Based on the power of love and light residing in all of us, there is no real justification for many of the divisions that exist among different groups.  The suitability of our hearts however does not ask for exclusivity.  Much of the outside elements we are connected to have requirements and conditions.  This does not mean our hearts say everyone need have the same access to our sacredness or knowledge of us.  However, our hearts do honor the presence of others no matter their connections or personal style.  God encourages us to create environments in our lives to support the growth of love and light in the world.  It begins by pausing, connecting with our hearts and listening to what our hearts tell us is suitable while quieting the determinations of the outside world for suitability.

Choosing to love is an act of courage.  We like the big grand gestures but the irony of the courageous choice to love is in its ordinariness.  Yes there are big displays of love which we adore.  The engagement and wedding, Valentine’s Day celebrations, mother’s giving birth, a father rescuing his child from falling off whatever he or she crawled up on, noble peace prizes, and so on.  Most of how love shows up as an opportunity to act in courage is in the everyday.  It is the choice to smile at the person who bumps into you on the ordinary street.  The choice to say thank you to ordinary check out clerk at the grocery store.  The choice to send a card wishing your Aunt a happy birthday.  Choosing to laugh off the person who cuts you off in traffic.  The action of telling someone they are welcome when they say thank you to you.  The choice to compliment the woman in the elevator who has a nice smile.  The decision to tell yourself you are okay after you experience a set back.  These ordinary moments which can take us off course or cause us to question the truth of our being are the moments when fear can take hold.  If instead we choose to act in love despite the fear we are build our muscle of courage.  Perhaps the ordinary  moments are the practice for showing up in loving courage in the bigger moments.  Perhaps the ordinary moments are the ones that matter most because they are the ones happening in the moment we are in.