dailydatewithgod

As we turn from one year to the next there are things we carry with us.  Some we intend to, others come along without our awareness.  Often the unknown are the hidden requests we hold within our hearts.  Perhaps we adopted the idea that we should not want. Perhaps we are worn out on holding out for the power of hope.  Despite trying to be as logical and practical as possible, our hearts cannot squander the power of the request for love to make itself known through our active participation in life as it is occurring. We get stuck in thinking we do not have a right to request the presence of love because we have not shown ourselves as worthy. God sees each breath we take as worthy because God knows it to be the fuel through which love can make itself known.  We confuse our unrealistic demand that love shows up only as we want it to with the sacred power of a simple request for love to be made visible through whatever form and shape best suits the moment we are in. God does not ask us to request love in a fluffy feel-good sense of love that is like a candied treat.  God calls upon the courage of our hearts to request love to show us how we are shaped by it and a beacon of it when we show up with our whole selves to the tasks at hand no matter what they are.  A request of love worthy of our heart’s intention is that which will allow it to move in and through us, in ways, we never knew ourselves to be.

The funny thing about life is we do not know how much of it we are capable of living until we test our limits.  We may think based on the labels that we fit within a particular caliber of any character traits from intelligence to physical strength.  In that case, we are allowing the experience of others to determine our caliber. God invites us to investigate the labels we carry around regardless of how well they work for us and see what our true caliber is. We do that by participating in the life that is right in front of us.  Our minds’ voice of fear will come with all kinds of reasons as to why we cannot handle particular things.  The simplest reasons are that is not our job, not our role, not what we are here to do, outside the norm, not what is expected, and so on.  The voice of fear is full of so many nots it ties our system into knots. When we pause and take a deep breath, we invite the energy of the heart into the conversation. Our hearts contain the courage to discover our caliber in any arena of life. We may find out that we lack the caliber of whatever is most needed in a given situation, but by involving our whole being in the experience we are provided evidence of the truth outside our ideas and labels.  The voice of fear which can take up lots of space in our minds is useful when it comes to determining our caliber to survive but rarely are its arguments against testing our caliber are about anything more than the survival of ideas.  When we practice inviting the courage of our hearts into the fear conversation our mind is having, we invoke the spirit of life which will show us what our caliber is.

It seems as though there has been a lot of attention paid to our diversity this year. This sits next to the reality that we are also similar. The degree to which these seemingly opposing ideas can be in agreement is the degree to which we can find both. It appears as there is no mutual ground. As though we need to decide which is more important, our unique diversity or our collective similarity. God invites us to notice that we as members of planet Earth are being called to find a mutuality that exists within the diversity and similarity of our natures. Instead of opting for an either-or, make room for both and. Existing in this level of mutuality begins with ourselves. Perhaps the reason we see the world torn by these ideas is that we are witnessing what happens for us internally. Instead of opting to pick a side that is more valuable to us, God encourages us to find the spaces within ourselves that are calling for mutuality. As we cultivate the practice of learning to turn our eyes inward and find the mutuality, we will also begin to notice it outside of ourselves. We are a whole body and every function is needed and serves a purpose. The mutuality which exists within the truth of who we are both as individuals and a collective is no different than the recognition that we need both the mind and the heart in order for us to exist. Focusing on the mutuality of our very being provides the lens we need to see our mutuality in all our labels as people and as cultures. In the seemingly long and winding road between our hearts and our minds is the mutuality path we need to exist in chaos and peace.

There is an image that sticks in my mind when I hear the word ponder. I imagine a person looking at their reflection in a pond. Perhaps it was my way of remembering the meaning of the word when I learned it as a kid. I put an unknown concept with a known one. We all learn this way although it is often couched as an adult learning style. However, from the moment concepts and ideas become known to us we use them to grasp on to new ones. It is why children marvel at new concepts that do not compute with fascination and adults often do so with contempt. As adults, we have so much cemented in that it can feel like a disruption of our existing knowledge when we are asked to take in something novel. Yet it is the very thing that keeps us alive. Being open to ponder the unknown is a way to keep ourselves young. When we encounter an experience where we are resistant to pondering something new we might pause and notice that it will invigorate us and keep us alive. Most often we see it as a threat especially if it calls some well-worn ideas in our minds into question. Some people have a curious template and are more open to ponder the unknown without resistance. Most of us put up some kind of resistance. We see it easily in other people. Especially those with whom we are not able to persuade to see things as we do. The irony in all of this is that we might get along a little bit better with those who hold opposing ideas if we remembered how resistant we can all be when it comes to pondering the unknown. God invites us to ponder the possibilities of our own growth by seeing what is open to us when we are willing to ponder the unknown. God encourages us to use the energy of our heart which houses the compassion needed to ponder the possibility that perhaps the reason someone holds an opposing view is that their mind is resisting the opportunity to ponder and stay young at heart and mind.

When I was a kid I remember that the kids with nicknames seemed to be cool. I am sure it was just a perception as it was only a shortened version or their initials that gave them a nickname. For a while I had my friends call me by my initials but it did not quite stick. I suppose something about giving myself the nickname to a group of people who already knew me made it hard to stick. When I was in college I had more luck. Nothing in my life was going according to my plan of moving away from home and going to a dance school so I figured I would give myself a new moniker. As I met new people at university I introduced myself as Cole. It took many of the letters of my name and I love Cole Porter’s music. Gratefully, It stuck for all 4 1/2 years before I decided to retire it. There was something about having a moniker of my choosing. Something connected to my love for music and particularly unique. It was also interesting to notice how many eyebrow lifts I got from professors as to why I was seemingly known for a typically male nickname. But I did not care in the least and I even met one guy at the Catholic Newman center who knew who Cole Porter was. It made up for all the clever folks who said “Cool Cole” like it was the first time it had ever been uttered. We do not all get to choose our names but we can choose a moniker. Even if it is one that is not uttered to anyone but ourselves. I often wonder what God’s moniker is for me. God calls each of us by a moniker that calls us to show up as the unique and true expression of life what we are. It matters little what monikers other people have for it, it is ours. I like to think of it as my moniker written in love. A love so profound that I only come close enough to potentially uttering it through the resonance of my being but not through words. We concern ourselves a lot with how people see us, but God invites us to see what the moniker on our hearts is because it is within that moniker that we will hear the voice of love.

When determining our stance on a particular issue it is important to consider all the factors involved. We have this unique capacity as human beings to explain our behavior post-action by some reasoning which may or may not explain our behavior. It is humbling to admit we do not know why we actually do something. The reality is so much of our behavior is automatic and programmed based on very well-practiced habits. Those habits are shaped by observing those around us at a young age and adapting our behavior to match theirs. It is how cultural constructs and accepted norms are formed. With the practice of awareness and mindful practice, we can alter our stance to mirror that which is aligned with the truth of who we uniquely are. Not all of our automatic stances need to be realigned. We can pick and choose as some of them may serve us well. Another difficult concept to grasp is that we do not do anything that does not serve us. It sounds preposterous especially when we find ourselves behaving in patterns that clearly are hurting us. This is where the recognition of our stance becomes useful. In our minds, formed before we were aware of it, there are fixed ideas and notions serving a survival purpose. Determining if it is actual survival or survival of who we think we are or are supposed to be, is the nitty-gritty of defacing the stance we are holding. God encourages us to investigate the mental and emotional stances underpinning our perspectives that create behaviors we sense we are no longer truly connected to so we can return to a place of choice in our lives.

There are endless things to sign up for and become involved in.  Almost too many to consider.  It is not until we enroll that we can consider ourselves involved.  Enrollment requires a commitment both to ourselves and to that which we are enrolling.  Enrollment is an agreement whether in writing or in conversation that we are putting energy and intention in a particular direction.  We can find ourselves invited to enrollment by others but it is our decision of enrollment that seals the deal.  On our daily dates, God invites me over and over again to enroll in the truth of who I am at my core.  When I am willing to let go of all my preconceived notions and trust that what God knows of me is more than I can possibly see or understand about myself and that whatever it is I do not need to fear it, do I agree to enrollment. The enrollment puts me in touch with the courage of my heart to face my fears about myself and what I will encounter in life.  It is the courage of the heart that sees past what my mind can see and gives me the power to walk forward in trust and hope.

In the modern world, it seems as though we are doused with information.  Always something coming at us.  I supposed it is relative as given our state of mind a barrage of information can seem like a lot coming at us or not.  Our mind’s natural propensity towards survival means we are on guard against any potential threat.  Whether we see ourselves existing in a friendly or harmful universe would thus determine the degree of dousing we experience.  On the other hand, when it comes to the positive and life-giving elements to be aware of it feels more like a splash.  It is the dash or pinch of an ingredient in the cake versus the cups of flour.  God encourages us to pay attention to the splashes as well as the downpour. The key is remembering that the splash can be all we need to wake us up and turn our attention elsewhere.  Sometimes splashes come in the form of annoyance so we wipe ourselves off in the hopes of not letting it affect us.  Other times a splash is a welcome way to cool down or wake up.  Either way, it subtly grabs our attention because it has an unknown pattern.  God invites us to both welcomes the splash that catches us by surprise and knows how to create a splash in our lives when we need to wake up.  Allowing ourselves the chance to flexibly engage with life’s unexpected patterns, grows the strength and courage for which we were born.

As we head into the end of the calendar year there is lots of discussion about what a rough year it has been individually and on a global level.  Since this is the only pandemic I have experienced in my lifetime I do not know the course of these things.  I only know based on the experiences in my life that most things do not follow the same kind of calendar that is on my computer. I am all for the hope that things will change and move in a better direction as we head into a new year.  This time of year as we head into a new season (in the northern hemisphere it is winter) we recognize we are at the cusp of a potential fresh start.  There are thoughts of what to let go of and what to carry with us into the new season or calendar year.  I can’t say I am for the idea of the pandemic continuing but I somehow think it will not resolve itself overnight.  In recovery, I learned and practice to the best of my ability the philosophy of One Day At A Time.  In truth, it is all we have.  The reality is each day we stand at the cusp of stepping into a new experience.  We know it will hold change and possibility and some of the same as the day before.  We get to choose at the cusp how we want to be with whatever shows up. It is the same as we close one year and enter another.  The cusp is simply a demarkation reminding us of our power to choose and create our experience whether it is a moment, a day, or a year.  I do not know what will come with 2021 but as I stand at the cusp of it I pause and reflect on who I have shown myself to be in 2020.  I want to bring what I have learned about love with me and use it as fuel to make choices in 2021.  I will ask God to help me let go of my ways of being that have pushed love away in 2020 and the courage to embrace the humility that comes with a desire to love more fully.  The cusp of a new year is an opportunity to reflect and remind ourselves we stand at choice every moment of our lives especially the ones that cannot be measured by the time clock.

In a world where we are seized with FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), it seems inconceivable that there are certain things we might choose to waive. It becomes a question of are we participating because something is available to us or because it is something we want to be available for. Just because we can participate does not mean it is for us. When we experience FOMO it serves as an opportunity to evaluate what the fear is really about. Most of the time our fears are not what they seem. By utilizing our capacity for mindful observation and curiosity, we can consider waiving our participation and see what surfaces. So often we rush to get rid of the fear that comes up instead of looking to the man behind the curtain, so to speak. We so quickly jump in and participate because we take the fear at face value. Knowing we have the option to waive our participation gives us the pause to determine whether or not we might actually want to wave goodbye to the experience. God encourages us to remember that whatever thinking and feelings are present in our reactions, they are indications of an energy fluctuation. Our level of energy fluctuation tells us something about ourselves. It is why life is about the process, not the content. We can waive the content but make use of the process by pausing to connect within and remember we are not slaves to our fears.