dailydatewithgod

One of the elements I miss in an electronic communication is tone.  There is something powerful about the quality of sound emanating from another person.  Someone’s tone is so much more than the sound of their voice which can perhaps be overlayed by the reader of someone’s message from memory.  The tone conveys the quality of the mood, the body posture, the context in which they are conveying their message, and the energy level of the human being.  I would love it if it could be like it is in the movies when the actual person narrates during the reading of the message but that is one of the differences between movies and life. What actually happens is that I use my tone to read the message.  I know this because when my mood does not match the words of the message I sometimes misread the message. When I pause to notice this I can recognize perhaps why my reaction is disproportionate to the situation.  Given how much communication happens void of tone, it is important that I have an awareness of my own tone.  On my daily dates with God, I am invited to notice the tone with which I enter our date.  God has shown me how to develop an awareness of the difference or similarity between the tone of my mind and the tone of my heart.  It is subtle and yet it speaks to the power of deepening an awareness of the truth of who we are versus how we want to react.  Each moment of communicative interaction in whatever form is an opportunity to be with what our tone is and how we want to convey it to others.

It is convenient to think of things as being one or the other.  It makes sense to our minds if we can categorize something or someone into this file or that file.  The organization of our reality is important to our sense of safety. Part of maturity is realizing that most things which have presence are not one or the other, they are what they are in the moment they are in.  There is much more nuance to aliveness then our minds can grasp.  It is neither light nor dark, it is shades of aliveness.  Our hearts which are ever aware of the reliance upon the flow of life in and out understand the need to make room for the shades of being. It is difficult in a results-driven culture to make room to value the process.  The process is messy and nuanced. The process requires presence in the moment to whatever shade of our experience is showing up.  Our hearts give us the courage to breathe through whatever shade of darkness or light is present.  We build up ideas in our minds that all good and light is the best way to be.  If being present means allowing for some shades of darkness to be there which would we rather? Do we want to not be present with what is and stay only with an expected ideal in our heads or do we want to live in and through an experience fully which is right here, right now?  The shades of darkness that we seemingly want to avoid can often make a turn towards the light sooner than I imagine.  In my experience being with those shades allows them to move through me instead of causing me to hold on to them because I am trying to pretend they are not there.

According to Einstein, our capacity to imagine is very powerful.  He seems like a smart guy.  There is an intentional nature to our imagination which occurs when we begin to explore something like a dream or a desire.  What we don’t often realize is how much we use our imagination unintentionally. Part of how our brain helps us to create meaning and understanding of the world around us is by filling in the gaps.  We are often provided limited information or sight from which to draw something and so our mind fills in the blanks. The fascinating part is that this imaginative capacity kicks in automatically. We do not have to tell ourselves to fill in the gaps, i.e. – make stuff up.  The reverie developed by our minds is constructed based on what we currently have within us.  In other words, we are not likely to create something completely outside our knowledge because we do not have it to draw from.  This wonderful reverie created by our minds has a downside when we take it to be a true fact.  Without noticing what is the driving force behind this capacity what we use to fill the gaps can be flawed.  Our fill-ins on automatic pilot come from our known experience.  God invites us to slow down long enough before we react based on our reverie to determine where the driver of the imagination is coming from.  It is strongly influenced by what we think and feel at the moment. It is why two people witnessing the same thing can recall or not recall certain things being present.  The grander question is are we using the faculties of our hearts to influence the reverie developed in our minds? When we pause to assess what is happening or where our perception is coming from, we make room for the heart’s input on the reverie created.  It is not easy because we are questioning the automatic programming of our minds. Our ego’s feel threatened because we value our ability to fill in the gaps when needed.  Gap filling is essential to our survival.  By inviting the reverie of our hearts into our imagination with intention, we bring in energy which surpasses understanding.  Stepping into reverie with the whole of ourselves opens up possibilities beyond mere survival.

I suppose it is too much of a trope to say that there is always a lot of talking going on but not a lot of listening. A productive discussion requires the presence of both.  Otherwise, it becomes a unilateral discourse equivalent to one of Shakespeare’s soliloquies. I see the value in having a voice and our mind is always ready to voice what it is thinking.  It is like a nonstop chatterbox. What we see in discourse with others mirrors the kind of discourse within ourselves.  There is a lot of talking and not as much listening.  The vehicle of listening requires a space between our thoughts.  God encourages us to call upon the energy of our hearts to take a beat with our thoughts.  The pause asked of us when we breathe in between voicing what we want to say is the space to allow something new to come in. True discourse is a give and take. Our hearts know well the ebb and flow of how things will move in and through us.  God taught me on our daily dates that practicing what it feels like to be connected in my heart allows me to insert a pause when my thinking does not stop.  The discourse that seems to be broken down in the world is the same as the brokenness of discourse between our hearts and minds.  We are meant to be a part of the flow of life.  The flow only exists when we exhale and then inhale and so on.  Yes, it is valuable to make room for our thoughts.  Our hearts are the vehicle that helps us determine which of those thoughts embrace the whole of who we are which then gives us a greater sense of which to voice. The inner discourse then shapes how we handle the discourse on the outside. The breath which awakens our hearts to ourselves is the same one that will make room to listen to what the person across from us is saying.  The pause moment allows us to hear not just the words but receive the energy and intention behind them.  How can we know how to navigate discourse if we are simply taking the words without the full package with which they travel.  Practicing the inner discourse between our minds and our hearts is what enables us to be fully present with whatever discourse is happening outside us without throwing us off course.

I am not sure what feelings and other elements are so easily associated with being fluffy.  On a physical level, the heart is this organ that is working nonstop.  It is pumping the fuel of blood and oxygen to all parts of our system. Some of us take it for granted only when it stops working.  It alerts us by initiating and alert when we need to pay close attention. It sends a warm flood of energy through our bodies when we are touched by something or someone.  This supposedly fluffy and soft element of our existence houses the courage we need to show up and be in our lives. Our hearts guard us against the seemingly overwhelming sensation of fear created by the imaginings of our minds by inviting curiosity. Our hearts are what give us the power to take our lives in stride.  We can handle things that present themselves fluffy or hard when our hearts prompt us to keep breathing.  Our hearts are designed to empower us to move with purpose and passion. Our minds might have us believe that our hearts play a back seat role.  As if because it is not on top it does not matter as much.  Our minds forget that without the cooperation of the heart, it would not get very far.  It is not a battle between our hearts and our minds.  It is the cooperation of the two essential pieces of our operation that allows us to stride through life and leave the imprint of our heartfelt mind on the world around us.

In balancing our understanding of the world we must bring into consideration not only what is happening in the world but what is happening inside of us. It is the interaction of those two forces that form our perceptions and knowledge of ourselves and the world.  To think we can take in what is going on outside of us without bringing into account what is happening inside of us is not real.  We talk about unbiased opinions but there are none.  We talk about unfiltered truth, but there is none.  The moment we take something outside of ourselves, digest it, and then send it out again it has changed.  Ultimately what this calls us to do is proceed with some humility.  The certainty we know of in our minds is not what is conveyed by our hearts.  The carriage of our hearts moves at a slightly slower pace than our minds. It knows we need to digest and filter information to determine how it resonates with the truth of who we are.  We all know this to be true if we are honest with ourselves.  We have been present in the same situation and then give completely different accounts of what happened.  We have listened to someone share an idea and created a completely different perspective from the others who heard the same idea.  The transportation of things through our minds is usually interested in speed.  The transportation of our heart works a bit more like a horse and carriage in a world of planes. God invites us to make room for both options.  We do not have to make the speed wrong to breathe in and out long enough for the carriage to show up. We can simply ask the riders of the plane to go get their baggage while we wait for the carriages to arrive.  We can choose which ideas we want to share from the truth of who we are or the first thing that occurs to us. The choice is ours to make.

In general, we try our best to not be confused or cause confusion.  It is helpful to operate clearly and coherently. Confusion can be distressing and elicit fear because we find ourselves in the unknown.  Often what our hearts understand however is confusing to the mind.  Part of the difficulty in the two working together is often because the language of the heart is working to translate the energy into words.  All the while our mind remains in confusion.  The more practiced we become in keeping open the channel between our hearts and our minds, the more directly the communication will be.  The confusion we feel in our minds will not alarm us to step into fear so quickly.  On my daily dates with God part of what I experience is an opportunity to practice placing my mind in the sureness of the truth of who I am in my heart regardless of what is seemingly chaotic outside of it.  Our minds can learn to connect with the language of our hearts but it is a practice. Just like when learning a new language if we keep defaulting to the language we know because it is more familiar we will not stretch ourselves to become comfortable.  Perhaps what we experience as confusion is merely our minds sticking to the language it knows better.

We live in a world operated by businesses.  We talk about being busy.  We stick our nose in other’s business.  When it comes to what is our business it can get confusing.  Multiple agendas are occurring simultaneously and it is our business to decipher what is in alignment with our agenda.  We do not have control over other people’s business. We only have control of our business.  Our business is composed of what we think, feel, and act based on our interpretation or perception of other’s business.  I know for a long time I thought for sure I could control what other people thought of me simply by showing up as to what was appealing to them.  I thought it was my business to make sure I was okay from the viewpoint of others.  It is a survival strategy that I developed at an early age.  Living under that illusion was helpful until I came across the truth that it was in fact an illusion.  Getting into recovery meant dealing with my business.  My business was facing the consequences of living under that illusion as well as others.  It meant recognizing that to maintain the illusion and squash who I was called to be from my heart meant slowly killing myself with sugar and self-hatred. God invites me daily on our dates to turn my attention to my business.  I can have all the thoughts and ideas about other people’s business but if I want to live happily and peacefully in this world the key is to redirect my attention to whom I am being while others are operating their business.  It is humbling to realize that our business is the only one to be concerned with, especially in a world that is filled with lots of loud voices expressing what they think of everyone else’s business.  The more time I spend connecting with my heart the clearer I become on how to make an impact in my business that will share a message to others.  That is where my business ends. It is not my business who receives my message or who might do something to alter their business because of my message.

It is not difficult to figure out what our minds are mulling over.  There is so much constant chatter the challenge is about distinguishing between the thoughts worthy of action and those which seem to be part of an automatic playlist. According to my daily dates with God, the key seems to be in connecting the thoughts of the mind with the roars of the heart.  The resounding energy that emanates from our hearts is easy to disregard because it does not show up the same way concepts are formed in our minds.  It takes practice to connect to the energetic frequency of our hearts.  Connecting to the wave of energy that resonates through our being begins with our breath.  It is the portal into slowing our minds down long enough to hear internally the resonance of our hearts roar.  The roar is a barrage of energy that has the power to shift our minds to attention when it comes time to act. Resonating with the roar of our hearts enables us to freely step into the flow of life from which we speak and act authentically.

I know I live in a different world when I read people reflecting on how they miss when landlines were the primary method of communication.  I can’t say there is something inherently stress-free about that idea.  I actually remember a time when you would arrange to meet a friend and you would have to trust they would be there because you couldn’t send a text message to let them know you were looking for parking or running late when you were on your way.  In some ways, it is as though we need more words and actions to show we are people of our word than before.  I enjoy technology and see so many benefits to it.  I am not always pleased by how gripping it feels.  Our brains are now wired to respond to the gripping noise or flash that we hear and see coming from our little mini computers.  It is like the dopamine in our system is ready to rush in and is whispering–pick it, pick it up, pick it up. We are acutely aware of what is gripping in our minds.  How many of know what is gripping in our hearts.  To connect with what is gripping to our hearts requires us to quiet what is begging to be gripped in our minds.  It is a gentler sensation and sometimes not as immediate.  God has taught me on our daily dates that learning to notice what is gripping to my heart creates a flow of energy that moves through me.  The energy of our hearts moves in resonance and we can breathe it through our whole system.  The beauty of what is gripping to our hearts is the capacity to involve our minds in recreating the experience whenever we want.  Getting to know the intricacies of our heart’s resonance can become gripping to our minds the more practiced we become.