dailydatewithgod

Have you ever felt like there was a battle going on inside your head?  All these thoughts running around like a bunch of kids on a baseball field who don’t agree on the different calls from each team about who is safe and who wins and if they are playing right.  In those moments we need a neutral party to intervene.  I like to refer to this as the umpiring role of my heart.  Especially when the banter back and forth gets heated I need an umpire with enough courage, strength, and power to get my mind to a place of being open again.  In those moments of stress stemming from over-analyzing a situation, it can seem unimaginable that there would be a way to break away and make room for something else.  The breath becomes a handy option as it is going to be happening over and over.  I can latch on to it when prompted by my body to take a breath by placing my hand on my heart.  My heart then has a moment to connect in and provide the necessary umpiring to help me resolve the analysis paralysis.  I am so certain that if I think about something more and with a greater effort I can wrangle all those thoughts into some sort of cohesive experience.  Rarely does it actually work.  If I remember those thoughts are like the kids on the baseball field I can remember to invite in the kind umpire of the heart to do his or her work. The heart umpire provides some clarity.  It reminds me of the true rules, the ones keeping me connected to the truth of who I am and who I am called to be in the world. From there I can make choices from all these thoughts about the next best course of action.  It doesn’t mean I will do it perfectly as it is not even about perfection. It means at the moment I am in all of me is in the game of life and its choices.

We do a lot of idolizing and cherishing things and people outside of ourselves.  It makes sense as children there is so much with which we experience awe.  Everything is new and fascinating.  As we get used to things they lose their shine.  We see no point in venerating them anymore because why would we cherish something or someone we take for granted?  This experience is not just with elements outside of ourselves. When did we stop venerating the inner experience of ourselves?  When did we decide we could take for granted our ability to think and breathe?  When did we choose to rely on without regarding the amazingness of our capacity to move and create a connection with others?  When we stop to think about what it is we are no longer venerating the list is long.  Somehow we correlate only newness with worthy to be venerated.  God invites us to see as God sees.  Every moment of breath is a new moment.  In the presence of this moment, we can be venerating many things.  Just because we interacted with this person yesterday does not mean something new has not occurred within them worthy of venerating.  Just because we made it to work in one piece without any accidents yesterday doesn’t mean we cannot venerate the systems of transportation, paved roads, or conscientiousness of other drivers.  Venerating may sound like something only applicable to that which has throughout history been venerated.  Today we live in a time of greater awareness.  There is no reason our gratitude list cannot become our venerating list.

Sometimes we get stuck in thinking we have nothing to offer.  We lose touch with the sacred truth of who we are and that we cannot help but radiate that in the world.  We can’t see our own light so we doubt it’s existence.  Sometimes when we cannot see it, others will notice the flickers inside of us.  We know they see something because they treat us kinder than we treat ourselves.  Often we are so busy looking at ourselves with the eyes of our head, we forget to look with the eyes of our hearts.  Heart speaks to the heart and when we take time to turn inward and connect to our heart despite what our head tells us, we find the flickers.  It may be momentary but if we look close enough we will encounter the flickers. They are the existence of God within us.  No matter how dark and dreary our experience of life is we cannot erase God from our blueprint.  Like all great designers who create, they leave part of themselves within each of their creations.  When I get stuck in fear or reverse pride I reach for the hand of God and ask to see the flicker of truth within me. God, show me my design.  God, guide me back to the flicker of light you have growing within me so I can disconnect from the flights of fear going through my mind.

When looking at the whole of a human being there are many parts involved in the completion of the whole.  Who we are is not just our words, our bodies, our sounds, our thoughts, our actions, our intentions, or our choices.  We are the rare combination of all those things, each of their various attributes, and more.  When we find ourselves inclined to judge ourselves or others, we might want to stop and ask which attributes are in judgment?  If we have a positive attribute coming from our heart’s intention but a negative attribute of action, which one do we say is the truth of who we are?  Maybe it is based on the circumstance.  Maybe the attributes of our decisions are based on false information or a closed heart.  Maybe the attributes of success that we show in our business are not the same attributes we can use to apply to our most intimate relationships.  Maybe we are attributing an invalid meaning to a particular attribute because the context has changed. If that is the case, which attributes are good and which are bad?  Is that even the right question?  Perhaps it is less about the judgments of good and bad and more about which attributes are working towards our growth in love.  We have all experienced times when living from a negative attribute culminated in the development of a positive attribute.  To what do we attribute the change? Did the change come from the movement of our hearts or our minds or both?  Did the change come from the intervention of another human being or from coming face to face with the truth of who we are?  With all the different attributes involved in the movement of life, it is hard to know to what do we attribute the movement.  Coming from the premise of what is working versus what attributes are not working leaves more space for all those attributes to emerge and be changed or adjusted to fuel our growth.  We will never have all the perfect attributes and we will never be able to always attribute good and bad to each one.  We can, however, pay attention to and learn from the attributes working towards our growth in love one moment at a time.

I think I learned more about how to speak Spanish from watching Spanish speaking soap operas than I did in my class in school.  The dramatic nature of the images allowed me to get a sense of what was being communicated verbally.  The images and interactions were so over the top you couldn’t help but pick up on what the actors were attempting to depict through language.  It was written on their faces.  Have you ever wondered what your life would depict if it was a silent film?  It sounds kind of funny.  The reality is despite our astute language skills we convey much more through our actions and energy.  The depiction of what is important to us is seen in what we do and what we spend our time on.  The depiction of who matters to us would be measured by our level of attention when with them.  Our interactions would depict whether or not we were listening, looking them in the eye, and if the energy flowing back and forth between us.  Our actions coupled with body language and facial expressions depict how we really feel about a situation regardless of what we are saying.  We do not give it much thought because specific words are easier to pinpoint.  Yet we have all walked into a room and known immediately whether the space in the room is the depiction of an okay or not okay place to be.  Our intention and attention have much more to do with what is depicted in any given situation about the status of our hearts and minds than anything we say.  If we start off by connecting with what is true for us at our core, we do not need to wonder about what is depicted by us in a given situation.

Have you ever noticed that in one context something seems pleasant and in another context it does not?  When we drop things it is not good.  When we feel drops of rain it can be either depending on how much you like rain.  When we drop information it is seen as helpful.  When we drop hints it can be frustrating or helpful depending on whether or not we wanted more than just hints. What we encounter is not the words themselves but the meaning we place on them.  Context is operating within the meaning.  So much communication gets messed up between individuals because they are operating from different contexts.  There are also layers of context.  There is individual, familial, societal, and the specific setting and situation. The good news is we can clear the air when it is muddled by context by providing it to each other instead of assuming it is the same for everyone. Context is not intended to make communication difficult. It is intended to be able to engage in the world in such a way that it does not require a constant explanation for everything.  Yet how many of us are operating from a context we neither remember learning or chose to follow?  When we interact with others who are coming from a different context, we can either be frustrated or see it as an opportunity to clarify our own context for ourselves.  We think it is their problem that they do not understand our context, but maybe it is ours and we don’t know it yet. Each interaction of frustration can be an opportunity and a gift even if it looks like it might be painful.  Another and seemingly easier option is to make the other wrong and ourselves right. When we do that we rob ourselves of the chance to get clear about our own contexts and learn about how we see things. God did not provide us this world with so many varieties of people and their contexts because God wanted us to be frustrated by what it takes to interact with one another.  God’s invitation is always about learning and growing our capacity to recognize the face of love no matter the context.  Then again, that is just part of how my daily dates with God have changed my context for love.

I marvel at the way sound works.  I can imagine what it must be like to be a musician who creates a conglomeration of sounds into a pattern that carries a message.  The reality is vibration is something in and around us all the time.  Perhaps because sound travels in waves it has a mesmerizing quality.  Whether it is the sound of a musical melody, the reverberation of the phone buzzing, the rhythmic cadence of a poem or how we are moved from within when we hear the sound of our own name, all these elements of sound have an ethereal quality.  What is it exactly about how sound connects to us that makes it sometimes seem magical?  Is it in the surprise created from not being able to see the waves before they reach us? Is it how we can find ourselves moving along with the resonance of the waves and catch ourselves moving without intending it?  Maybe it is less about knowing why and choosing to join in the mystery and be a part of the surprise.  Years ago there was this show called STOMP.  It was the performance of a percussion group who as street performers invited people to stop, listen and watch.  It stemmed from a practice dating back to the Middle Ages and the Renaissance all about how we could find music in the sounds of the ordinary. If we listen very closely we can hear the vibrations in our own bodies.  Babies are drawn to simple rhythmic beats because they remind them of the sound of their mother’s heart when they were in her womb. We think we outgrow this until we learn what it is like to connect to the sound of our own heart.  On my daily date with God, I start off by placing my hand over my heart and connecting to the current of my own vibrations.  It is also where I can go at any time during the day to center myself.   The sound of our hearts beating is the calling card of our soul to go within and remember where life is flowing to and from all day and all night. Reconnecting to this source of life vibrating within us reminds us we have what we need when the waves and experiences of life outside of ourselves seem vigilant about throwing us out of rhythm.  Sound is the gateway to find our core.

One of the beautiful things about being alive in the world we are in today is how many choices we have.  One of the overwhelming things about being alive in the world we are in today is how many choices we have. How is it possible that the very thing we think we want and need more of causes us to experience what social scientists call “decision fatigue”? It turns out when we have so much choice it wears out the part of our brain that works to make those decisions. One method to curbing this is to create habits in which the decision has already been made and just needs the action carried out. Before we get to creating habits we need to have a sense of whether or not it is even something we need to incorporate into our life.  Knowing what path we are on and where we are intending to go gives us the parameters with which to work. It doesn’t mean knowing the avenues we are traveling are the only ones we can traverse.  It does mean we have some sense of which decisions will keep us moving in the direction of the path we are on.  There can be several avenues to get there and sometimes we have to take side streets.  However, being able to name the avenue we are on allows us to know which alternate streets are most likely to keep in the line of sight of our main avenue.  Decisions are not just a mental thing.  Our hearts play a larger role than we realize. Being in alignment within ourselves allows us to be who we are called to be no matter where we are traveling. If we stay in sync with our hearts we will find it easier to navigate through the many avenues we come across on our path and will not be overwhelmed when it comes to choosing what we keep us on track.

I can easily take for granted my ability to see. There is so much I take in about the world through my eyes. It is also easy to be fooled by my eyes. I can incorrectly think I understand something because I can see it. Have you ever found yourself asking someone if you could see something when actually what you meant was you wanted to hold it and take a closer look? Are we using the wrong word when we ask to see something and want to get our hands on it? Do we see more of something when we touch it and can move it around? By touching it and moving it around we see something from more angles. Perhaps we already know that when we are seeing something we are limited by the angle from which we are seeing it. Perhaps we know intuitively that we want to be able to fully see something and it requires more than just our eyes. Is that what we mean when we say, “seeing is believing”? We recognize in the way we use our words that the heart plays a role in seeing.  It is the same space that knows what it means to be seen.  The whole purpose of seeing is on some level to know it exists.  We make the presumption of existence based on what we are seeing.  The funny thing is that we do not realize that what we see is shaped by where we are with ourselves.  As Anais Nin wrote, “We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.”  Therefore what we are seeing, what we get our hands on can provide sight into ourselves and where we are in the moment.

We have a sense of who we are. When asked to describe ourselves we start with the basics such as name, gender, and role in a family.  Perhaps we include our occupation and accolades such as degrees or titles earned.  We may share our perspectives on life and philosophical or political inclinations. All those elements of ourselves reside in our description of ourselves and tell others something about us. However, those descriptions do not speak of what is residing in our hearts.  They share what we may have residing in us because of particular experiences but they do not provide information about how we process those experiences.  Energetically we are sharing what is residing in our hearts without realizing it.  We all know it when we encounter someone with whom it is clear does not want us to approach with any kind of closeness or who cannot look us in the eye.  We also have been around those who have energy residing in them which invites us closer. Recognizing for ourselves what is residing in our hearts is important if we want to be present with the whole of our being.  We may have some wounds residing in our hearts causing us to want to be protective.  We may experience different parts of ourselves depending on the kind of people we are around and what we feel is residing in them.  My daily dates with God have taught me how to be present with what is residing in my heart at the moment and hold that space regardless of what I sense is residing in others.  We are called to be the truth of who we are. Deep down we may believe there is too much darkness residing in us and we resist connecting to it, but God calls us to discover the love God has designed us with which is also residing in our hearts. Any time we wish to delve past our perceived darkness and touch its light, God assures us it is residing in there.