dailydatewithgod

There is Grand Designer who is LOVE who continually creates out of love and openness.  This Being is with me and you and within us even when we are not aware of it.  In fact, sometimes the clearest way for me to know that I am not God is when I find myself in a space of a closed heart.  A heart that feels so closed off that my first reaction to anything or anyone is “go away” (that is putting it nicely).  How do I get there? Sometimes it doesn’t take much.  Take this morning for example.  I get up, have my date time with God and as I set up my computer to write this blog there is no internet access.  Hmm, that is strange.  A part of me feels a tug to try to fix that and then I realize I am in the middle of my date and need to be present where I am so I stop.  I get centered and in my mind I reach for the hand of God.  I acknowledge that I am now focused on how I will not be able to post my blog and what about the people who read it every morning (all seven of you)? They will be disappointed.  I inform God that I am handing this over to Him because I am powerless over this.  So I finish the date albeit a little distracted and try to fix the issue. This means spending time on the phone with the cable people who after a 1/2 hour cannot resolve it either and not being there for my morning phone appointments for my spiritual sisters (cuz the phone is down too by the way!). This caused me to run a little behind and despite my best efforts I ultimately end up being late to work.  As I am going from the gym to the mechanic and then to the train, I am asking God to replace my thinking with God-thinking.  I read the serenity prayer and the St. Francis’ Prayer on the train. I smile at people despite not wanting to and end up clocking in late to work cuz I missed the first train.  When I finally stop, I feel the self-pity setting because I have not met my perfectionist unrealistic expectations of not being late for work, even if its only 8 minutes. Whoa!  I can feel my heart want to close off as I am interacting with people at the office but surprisingly their smiles and their warmth of greeting make that virtually impossible.  LOL!  (Thanks for showing up in my co-workers this morning God). I am faced with a decision now, will I lose my whole day to eight minutes?  I’d rather not.  God show me how to keep my heart open when my self-loathing thoughts want to shut all heart systems down.  Help me to see the beauty of the imperfections of being human and how not to lose out on connecting with one of your children this day.  Yes in the grand scheme of things this is no big deal and heck I sure did a lot this morning!  I am reminded how easy it is to get caught up the silly madness that my thoughts go towards.  If I let them, if I do not reach for the Hand of God, I will close off my heart and suddenly lose tolerance for all things that don’t measure up in my mind.  So I today is yet another example of how I never know what is going to come out when I sit down to type but thank you for reading.  If it touches you,  I am grateful for your  open heart in this moment.  My prayer for us today is that when we are presented with the choice of whether to close our hearts because of some seemingly important thought that we remember that God is only a hand reach away and in His Hand lies the vitality of Our Hearts.  Make it a great one!  Peace~Colleen