dailydatewithgod

It is kind of humorous that God operates on such a subtle level.  I sometimes think of God posses this stealth power of being.  Perhaps because the energy of love is so overwhelming it must be transmitted to us in small doses, lest we be overwhelmed.  As my daily dates with God became a regular thing I noticed a shift in how I perceived life.  I began to be on the lookout for signs of God’s presence throughout the day.  I bothered to get quiet and listen for the still small voice that was nudging me in one direction or the other. I also began to notice the subtle communication that seemed to be coming from my body.  A sense to move forward or not, a literal pause before speaking, or a feeling in my gut. As an incest survivor I decided early on that my body had betrayed me.  It was the only way to make logical sense of the sensations I was feeling in them before I had the language and the context to understand what they were.  No one was able to explain to me or even notice I was experiencing anything.  So I did the only thing a child does which is just make it all bad. So as I grew in my daily relationship with God and began to notice these inklings my body was having.  They had been there all along but since my inklings did not match what was happening to me as a kid over and over I concluded they were wrong and bad.  I was basing it on all past experience.  Gratefully, because God is patient with me and surrounded me with people to whom I could begin to share and process the past experiences, I am able to slowly pay attention to the inklings without being alarmed all the time.  In that process, which is a daily one, I begin to know who I am and unveil some wounded parts that are in need of love.  If I were to continue to exclude those inklings I would be missing out on part of the wholeness of the human experience God has in store for me.  We all have experiences which taint our perspective on some of our life experience.  We carry some wounds often in our bodies and those may be the very areas where these inklings towards knowing ourselves and the very essence of love may be hiding.  God presents them to us in inklings so we can slowly step into an adult knowing of the whole of ourselves and know love more fully.