dailydatewithgod

As human beings, we are very adaptive.  It is essential for our survival that we know how to flex around the realities of life.  It is so interesting the degree to which we become fixed in our minds.  When we are in the mode of adaptation, we can make adjustments as we go.  The moment the adaptation becomes an adaptive way of being, we are less flexible.  It is why the interplay between the heart and mind is so essential.  Our hearts are in a fluid mode of adaptation because to become fixed would mean we stop breathing and allowing the energy of life to flow through us.  When we use the power of adaptation in our minds to notice what has made our hearts increase or decrease their variability, we are using the systems of our being in an interrelated fashion to be in the flow of life.  The observation becomes the vehicle through which we use our system of adaptation for our benefit instead of being used by it. We respond to life rather than react to it. God invites us to acknowledge the power of adaptation as something we can use to keep ourselves present in the flow of witnessing the beauty of reality as it is happening.

It seems that the process of maturing into adulthood requires one to find their voice.  Whether it was implied or there were explicit experiences, most children learn quickly that there are limits to their self-expression.  Early on we gather information by watching adults about what it is okay to speak up about and what is not.  It is how we learn to function in our family and society.  There is no right or wrong to this, it makes sense that there are structures and acceptable ways of behaving to belong. On one hand, this means we participate in tacit approval.  On the other hand, it means there are likely tacit elements of who we are which are not voiced or expressed.  God invites us to listen in to the tacit and discover a part of ourselves.  Perhaps we took the need to be silent and slapped on the meaning that what we had within us to express was wrong or bad.  Perhaps we took the tacit agreement to drive ourselves by the need to continually seek the approval of others and thus sacrificed part of ourselves.  Perhaps because of the tacit agreement, we convinced ourselves we did not actually think and feel the way we did.  Whatever form it took, it is not too late to invite those elements to come forward.  They may not need to be expressed to the outside world, but our hearts long to hear the tacit come to life through the recognition of its role in the whole of who we are.  The tacit if given voice in our hearts to ourselves means it no longer has to fester in the shadows. Making peace with what has been tacit is part of the process of maturing.  Maturing from someone who simply follows the rules of society and family and someone who knows through the whole of who they which tacit agreements of society and family are in alignment with them and can be expressed with integrity.

It is almost incomprehensible the degree to which we are often the cause of our own suffering. In my experience, my suffering is less related to actual physical or emotional pain and more connected to the meaning and story I create out of what I am experiencing. It is not as though any of us set out to create stories and meaning that will cause suffering. We simply fall prey to the machinations of our minds automation and forget to keep it in check. Based on our need to survive our minds will create any construct which ensures our survival. As long as the system is still operating, survival will sign off on it. Given the number of potential obstacles to survival, our minds are on guard for anything that has a hint of threat. God encourages us to use the system of our heart and breath to take it down a notch. Using our breath to bring our minds into a state of awareness is what can chip away at the perceived immediacy of a threat. When it comes to the distinction between something that is actually happening and our perception of that happening as being a threat we need the energy of our hearts to have the courage to face the reality. Rest assured if we are in a real place of threat, our bodies will jump into action. If upon reflection we recognize that the action is not warranted we can notice that we are reacting to a perceived threat that is not actually present in the moment we are reacting. Maybe it is from the past or maybe it is from a projected future. The notch we are invited to use to bring us back to the present moment is our breath. It seems too simple but in actuality, it is a game-changing notch towards responding authentically to reality. I am not sure about you, but whenever I fight reality, I lose. There are may be many notches needed to slowly deescalate from reacting but it starts with our breath and introducing our heart’s energy into the equation. It is the notch that allows us to open up a deep relationship with the spirit of life that moves in and out of us all the time.

We easily get swept away by what we see. We figure if we are seeing it, it is all there is to see. We lose sight of the fact that what we see or what we think we see is based on what filters we have. We do not intentionally blind ourselves but it is inevitable. Often times what we are seeing is merely an insinuation of what is happening. We are only getting a hint of the full picture. We cannot see all things from all angles. We cannot know all the ingredients seen and unseen that are mixed into what is showing itself to us in this moment. The subtlety involved in what we see from moment to moment flies in the face of what we often determine is a fact. A defeatist way to approach this would to not put any value on what we see. God encourages us to pay attention to the insinuation before us by noticing what it creates within us. What ideas are conjured up in our minds because of the insinuation? What feelings are moving in our bodies because of the insinuation? Are our hearts beating fast or slow? Do we find the insinuation causes us to tighten our breath and have more ease? There is no specific value to an insinuation, only the story we create around it based not on what our eyes are seeing but on what the whole of us is making out of being present with it. There is value in what we see, there is greater value in what the insinuation showing us about what is happening within us.

One thing that has struck me since I remember hearing in scriptures as a kid is how the people in the bible stories seem to always be requesting signs. I get it, we want proof. We want God to show us that he is who he says he is. On my daily dates with God, I have come to understand that signs are all over the place. The difficulty we have is in what meaning we give them. It is like we are constantly searching for an either-or. It either is evidence of God or it is not. But what if the indicator of God’s presence is something we are so busy ignoring because it is not presenting the way we expect. How much proof of God’s presence is available through a myriad of indications but we are too blind to see it. We get caught up in our version of how God is supposed to show up that we miss out on every indication that God is showing up. When I remember to pause and take a breath, allowing the reality of my body and how it keeps me going I am struck at what an indicator it is to the presence of God. I take it for granted because in my mind it is a given. To all the people who are suffering in body and mind, where most of what they experience is dysfunction in their body, it is not a given. By tapping into the energy of my heart through my breath, I open the door to see the indicators of God’s presence through that act and heighten my sense of the presence of all the other indicators. When I can pause and be willing to let go of my conception of what an indicator of God’s presence is, I am free to experience the multitude of indicators right in front of my face.

Sometimes all that is needed is a flip in our perception. According to A Course In Miracles, a miracle is defined as a change in perception. At the outset it seems too simplistic but how else would you describe being able to see something from a different lens? Given how strongly we all hold on to our perception of what we are seeing and thinking as being true and in some cases the only valid truth there is, it would take a miracle for that to change. God works more simply than most of us imagine. We think for a miracle to occur many forces need to change and there needs to be an alteration in the time-space continuum. What if a miracle is simple and inversion of what we have perceived up to that point? I have learned in recovery that as I change and grow so does my experience of those with whom I interact. It is not because they are changing but because the lens through which I see has changed. It happens slowly over time but some relationships with people, ideas, and experiences are a complete inversion from what they used to be. My relationship to fear is one of the most pivotal elements of inversion I can think of. It does not mean I never experience fear. Quite the opposite as I did not stop being human. The inversion is in how I relate to it. When I become aware of something I am approaching with fear the inversion is not to run faster from it but to walk into it. I pause, take a deep breath, and ask God to show me what it is here to teach me. The inversion is that I do not see it as defining me but as an opportunity for me to learn more about the courageous part of myself. If that is not a miracle of a perceived way of thinking, I do not know what is.

The pivotal scene in the Wizard of Oz is when Toto peels back the curtain to reveal the Great Oz as no more than a man behind a big microphone. The drapery was placed there to hide the truth of what was happening and maintain the illusion that this man had much more power than he did. Drapery in and of itself is not bad. It is how we use it. If we are putting up drapery to hide the truth of who we are to others the only person we are truly hiding from is ourselves. It is clear that the Great Oz clearly lacked the heart, brain, and courage needed to show himself to the world. Ironically the very thing Dorothy and her pals were seeking. When we hide behind our drapery we can convince others that we have what they all want all the while struggling to find it for ourselves. Only by peeling back the drapery can we shed the light on what is lacking and set out on a course to discover it. God has equipped all of us with all the heart, mind, and courage we need for this life. It is in stepping out behind the curtain and engaging with life that we discover what has always been there. Walking around with drapery makes life more difficult. We have to trouble ourselves with making sure no one can peep through the curtain or somehow manage to peel it back. We are not able to see what we are seeking when we allow ourselves to hide behind our own drapery. Life can be rough and I have certainly wanted to draw the curtains and hide out a time or two. God has taught me on our daily dates that when I pause, take a breath which ignites the life energy within my heart I find the courage which gives me the mind to choose to step out behind the tapestry and give life a try. It is a moment to moment decision.

Too often we get tripped up by life because it doesn’t happen the way we expect it.  We spend our time disgruntled by what is happening in contrast to our expectations and wonder why we are exhausted.  I have learned through my daily dates with God that things just are the way they are.  I get to choose how I view them.  This includes what meaning I assign and the way I define them.  The longer I am in a relationship with God and the deeper I am called to grow into the fullest expression of who I am at my core, I am able to see life with a greater sense of clarity. As much as I have great ideas about how things should be, it is best to take a posture of humility.  I cannot possibly know all the angles of perspective or ingredients which will present themselves in any given situation.  Given how much I could be potentially missing, it doesn’t make sense that I would come up with the best scenario possible.  This does not mean I take a victim-like posture, but instead, approach life by allowing the truest expression of myself to emerge no matter what happens.  I cannot do this alone and my truest expression will not look the same each day or even in different moments of the same day. When I fail to rise to my own truth, I can learn from it and keep showing up.  It is not about perfection or getting it right, it is about growing and learning.  It is about connecting to the moments even the little ones that I can string together to show myself that I am growing despite how it may look.  It is about having an internal heart measurement of courage instead of seeking external validation for a triumphant victory.  God has called us each to grow in our learning of the truth of who we are at our core and how the courage to love is ready to ride alongside us and champion our cause.  There are times we forget who we are and we falter.  Those are the moments when the courage to love always ready within our hearts calls on us to take a deep breath and reconnect so we can stand back up and try again.

If we could map out the terrain and know all the twists and turns we would encounter life would be easier, right? I certainly have thought this many times even though it is contradictory to my experience.  It is usually the junctures I did not foresee that became the catalyst that ignited my growth in understanding who I am and my capacity for being. Even when we know the juncture that is coming up we cannot foretell all the variations within that particular juncture. With each twist, there are limitless possibilities as to what direction we can go in.  We cannot know who else will show up at the same juncture nor the angle of their approach.  We cannot know what the chemistry of all the elements present in the juncture will provide the most potent recipe for our growth.  Each juncture is an opportunity to grow our trust in ourselves.  The knowledge we can trust ourselves to get through and survive whatever comes our way is ultimately what we are seeking in wanting to know the future.  Yet it is only when we encounter the juncture we did not anticipate that we get to know with experiential certainty that we have what it takes.  It may sound funny, but life is here for us to play and experiment as we get to know who we are and why we are here.  Unfortunately, many of us bought the storyline that there is the right and wrong way to go about it.  As someone so concerned with doing it right that I forfeit many junctures all together, I know where that road leads.  On my daily dates with God with learning and growing into love as my guide, I am more willing each day to take a chance on me as I face the unknown junctures.  I have learned to trust that God seems to know more about who I am and what I am capable of and life presents junctures unexpected so I can learn to see me as God sees me.

It is hard for our minds to wrap around the visceral space of our experience. Whether it is what drives our decisions or how we find ourselves reacting, our minds are going to push to make sense of the visceral. We find a sense of security in being able to put specific words and labels. It is helpful to have a category to put things in. It puts our minds at ease. When we are not at ease we know it at a visceral level. Our hearts contain the energy to create a place of peace between the intellectual and the visceral. Rarely are things one or the other. Life is simply not so black and white. It is part of the maturity process to grasp what it means to live in a universe full of duality. Like many things it is not the reality which is the problem, it is our resistance to acceptance of reality. We have probably lost track of the number of conversations we have had with ourselves and others about how things are not the way they “should” be or we “expected” them to be. In the context of making peace between our instinct and our intellect finding a middle ground with acceptance of the reality of both and how they operate is the place to start. Our hearts contain the dynamic energy needed to bridge the gap between our visceral and our intellectual realities. A simple breath to awaken the heart gives us the moment of pause to prevent reacting from a place of rejection of either’s viewpoint. Our heart can hold the space for the visceral and intellectual reality in such a way that we do not break into a war with ourselves that we cannot win. God has gifted us with the three minds through which to be present in our lives. When we learn to use all of who we are in our lives we walk in alignment with the truth of who we are.