The course of our lives can feel like it slips past us. We wake up to find ourselves chronologically older wondering what happened to all the time we had when we were younger. There is this idea that things simply break down or shut down as we get older. We forget things and our bodies don’t bounce back as quickly. We tend to get so used to what we see in our daily lives that we lose touch with the fascination we had as a kid. We tend to think we know all there is to know. One of my core tenants is learning and is a driver in my life. I knew from a young age I always wanted to be learning. I can be a bit of an information or improvement junkie but on the positive side, it creates a lens of wonderment for life. There is always something to be discovered or uncovered. Wonderment is a link to the energy of our hearts. It allows us to let go of what we know is true and what we fear might be true according to our mind’s main focus of survival. Our heart can play in the wonderment of life because it does not have the same timeline as the mind. Our heart subsists on the energy of love which is not limited by time and space. To allow ourselves to be present to the wonderment of life connects us to our childhood and our adulthood because they are one in the same heart.
Be Unknown Correction!
One pivotal idea that I learned in recovery is the distinction between making a mistake and being a mistake. Growing up based on the circumstance, I drew the conclusion that they were one and the same. My goal then became to not make any mistakes and if I did which is human, I was mortified. I was sure I had failed even if it was as simple as having the wrong answer in class at school. Later on, as a teacher, I came across the saying which I posted in my classroom: ” The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything.” I posted it but on a deeper level, I did not believe it. I still wanted to be the one who gave the information without correction needed. Teaching middle school made it relatively easy because most of the students still think the teacher is right most of the time. When I got into recovery, working with a sponsor taught me what it was like to received loving correction. Her voice was not as loud and demeaning as the one in my head. Her voice was not as shame ridden as the one in my head. Then as my daily dates with God began I learned that the only mistakes we make are the ones we learn nothing from. Making room for correction that comes from the heart is about course correction, not condemnation. At a time when we may find ourselves operating in the fear stories of our mind that tells us if we do not do this correctly, we will die, it is good to know that the soft gentle voice of correction for any possible missteps is as accessible as our breath.
What element of our lives are most in need of the heart’s gentle voice of course correction today?
Be Unknown Tweaks!
It goes without saying that change is inevitable. We can choose to see that as a burden or a gift. Depending on the day it might be both. The most fundamental and powerful gift we can give ourselves is to change our perspective. We often want this for others, usually, so they will see things our way. However, tapping into the capacity to make our own little tweaks empowers us to flex the muscles of breathing through changes and navigating potential fears that arise. Perhaps you have experienced a time when you resisted a change because all you could see are the negative potentials stemming from it. As you look back now, you realize you did not know the positive potentials which were also present. Being open to tweaking our perspective gives us the grace to walk through life and not get so hooked by fear of the unknown. This is not necessarily easy given our biological imperative for survival which keeps us on the lookout for what might go wrong. One tool I have learned through my daily dates with God is making little tweaks which slowly lead me into releasing the possible fear that seems like it wants to grip me and cripple my power to choose my attitude. A powerful practice for me is acceptance. When I am not accepting of a person, situation, feeling, or whatever and it seems like miles of grueling work to get to a place of acceptance, I have to start with a tweak. The tweak is to acknowledge that I am not accepting at this moment. But, I can accept that I don’t accept right now. It is a simple tweak coming from a place of acknowledgment which emanates from my heart. It can quiet the loud judging mind which wants to condemn me as not being spiritual enough to be in a place of acceptance yet. The tweak of accepting my non-acceptance makes breathing room for accepting me exactly as I am in this moment.
How much more breathing room can we allow our hearts to extend by tweaking our perspective and accepting that we are not in acceptance of some elements of our lives today?
Be Unknown Reserve!
When we are stressed out or challenged beyond what we believe is our capacity, we find ourselves at a choice point. We can give in to the situation either by giving up or by surrendering. We can choose to fight or stay in the game long enough to see if we are made of anything else. We can make room for our creativity to bubble up and invent a new way of handling things. We can affirm who we know ourselves to be and recognize that no circumstance can change who we are at our core. These options come from a reserve present in our hearts. We may not even know it is there because we have managed thus far to exist mostly in our minds. Everything around us confirms that we can and should be able to think our way out of whatever it is. The truth is as whole human beings we are neither heart or mind, we are the two together. Until we are challenged, we may not discover the reserve in our hearts. Until we find ourselves in something not predicted by our mind, do we look within to find the reserve. The energetic courage reserve at the core of our being is always there for us. God created it within us so we would never lose our connection to the truth and power of love. Our mind may jump in telling us of our limitations because it does not want to be maxed out due to possible survival implications, but it can only have the final say if we do not invite our mind into the reserve of our hearts. Creativity begins with the interplay between our hearts and our minds.
When faced with a challenge are we curious enough to tap into the reserve of our hearts and discover who we are as more than our mind is telling us we are today?
Be Unknown Approach!
As change occurs, we adapt. One thing the history of time has shown is the tremendous reliance and power of the human-animal to adapt to change. We may have lots of stories in our heads about our ability or dealing with the unknown, but when push comes to shove we do what needs to be done. Today’s circumstances find us in a space of juggling multiple points of change which may seem overwhelming and cause us to doubt ourselves. God invites us to take a different approach. God encourages us to pause from the juggling in our minds of the changes and possible changes and connect to our hearts. Our mind focuses on all the little pieces of change and our hearts take an approach of wholeness. The approach of the heart reminds us to see what does not change amid changes. The approach of connecting to our breath as without it nothing can happen. The approach of seeing all changes as a part of a whole instead of separate pieces. The approach of belief in love is more powerful than fear. The approach of guiding us to make one choice at a time which is actually all we can do. The approach of an invitation to link with our minds so our choices represent the balance of who we are as a whole being.
Which approach will we use to guide us through the changes we need to make today?
Be Unknown Ardor!
One thing I am acutely aware of in these different times is how little nature seems to be affected. The sun still rises and sets. The birds still sing in the morning. The plants are still growing. The wind is still moving the air. The earth knows its spring but we find ourselves not so sure. I like to think that the same ardor with which the birds greet a new day lives in each of us and always has. We are not separate from this whole system in which we live. I think we are now more attuned to how interconnected we are. The ever-changing and movement of nature can be our angels at this time. When I am out walking in the morning I hear the birds sing as if to say, “Aren’t you excited? It’s morning! The light came up again!” It may seem like dark times but the ardor with which we can choose to embrace the light as soon as it appears can be a guide to us as we are faced with what seems like continual darkness in our days. God invites us to connect with the ardor for life which lives within us. It is the hope and trust that even though the day is darkest before the dawn, the next thing is the dawn. Tapping into our heart space gives us access to the ardor needed to fuel the ability to show up for whatever comes as we walk through our days.
How can we connect to the ardor for life that exists within us and can carry us when we need it to through this day?
Be Unknown Expectation!
In recovery, I learned about the role of expectations. How they keep me out of the moment I am in and in the realm of imaging how I want things to be. They often keep me at a distance from acceptance and can lead to resentment. Whether it is expectations of myself, others, situations or outcomes, learning to adjust them to reality is my key to freedom. I have also learned the distinction between expectations and hope. An expectation is my mind’s fancy way of shoulding on something. Whenever I am in the “shoulds”, I am not in reality. Hope is the realm of the heart. Placing love at the forefront prompts hope. I can still bring love into a situation by accepting it for what it is instead of expecting it to be different because I hope it would be and then being let down. Hope is believing I can make adjustments to my behavior and not tear myself to pieces because I expected to act differently than I did. Hope is trusting that all will turn out exactly as it needs to for everyone involved without expecting things to go my way because I believe it will all end up badly if it doesn’t. Expectations are a valuable tool in helping to bring me back to reality and see it with love. Expectations are a sign that it would help to let things go and hope in the power of love even when things don’t show up the way I think they should. God invites us to hold on to the only expectation that matters . . . expect love to win.
How might we live our lives differently if we let go of all our specific expectations of how things should be and hold on to the power of God’s expectation that love will win today?
Be Unknown Within!
Growing up Catholic I learned the preciousness of this time of year. The Lenten weeks of preparation for entering into Holy Week which started with Palm Sunday and the telling of the Passion of Christ to ending in the triumph of the Resurrection on Easter. I am guessing our lives and the state of the world feels a lot like a Lenten season that has no end. We may feel it intensely like one long Holy Week that was supposed to have ended a few days ago with the resurrection on Easter. It may feel like we still haven’t woken up on Easter morning to a Resurrection experience yet. While I cannot predict the future my guess is that there will be a resurrection, I just don’t know when. I also imagine it will be different for different people. It is clear we are all walking a path where there is some level of needing to slow down, get quiet and go within. Even for me who works in the Healthcare industry and is still showing up to work each day. Aside from the grocery store, I am home. I attend recovery meetings through my computer and connect with friends and family on the phone. I never appreciated the gal who waxes my eyebrows so much as I do now. LOL! It is a good thing this blog isn’t video showing how long my eyebrows have grown or my attempt at tweezing them which is more painful when self-inflicted, but I digress. My experience on my daily dates with God is as an invitation to go within and connect to my true self. Some of us may have tried it but got distracted. Some of us may have tried a couple of times but found we didn’t like what came up and then got busy doing other things. For me, it wasn’t until my life depended upon it that I made a consistent effort I started with 2 minutes each day marked on my calendar to go within on a date with God. With persistent and consistent effort I began to meet the being God had always known and attempted to invite me to see. Maybe with no end in sight of this change in our lives, we have that same chance. Perhaps we are all being invited to go within, more than just in the physical sense. What if our resurrection is about the reunited connection with ourselves? What if this bizarre circumstance lends itself to us knowing more about the truth of who we are? What if not doing is much allows us to remember we are human beings, not human doings?
Will we use this time of slowing down our doings to get to know the being within that God has known today and every day?
Be Unknown Still!
One thing I have learned in recovery and all I have been through in my life, no matter what, God is still love. Love is still love. It doesn’t matter how big or loud the fear gets. It doesn’t matter how crazy or uncertain I feel. Nothing in my experience or thinking can undo the power of love. Love is still love. It triumphs in little ways, it triumphs in big ways. Until the day when I figure out how not to be born, I must concede that God is still love. My concept of God will change. My understanding and experiences of God will change as I grow and change. At my core in my heart of hearts where love’s vibration keeps me alive literally and figuratively, love is still love. It sounds like a silly saying or a way of making myself feel better when it all feels like crap. Yet in my quiet time, I have learned to connect when the truth is being spoken. A truth that resonates in my heart and for me today that truth is God is still love. So I will sit in that stillness, I will cry in that stillness, I will laugh in that stillness, I will be held in that stillness, I will bank on that stillness and most importantly, I will breathe in that stillness.
Do we dare believe the still small voice in our hearts that resonates with the truth that God is still love today?
Be Unknown Shot!
Years ago as a teacher of religion in a Catholic school, once a week my students opening class journal entry prompt would ask them about a Godincidence that occurred in the last week. It was my term for coincidence in which God remained anonymous. The idea was to get them thinking about how God might show up in their lives that perhaps was outside of what they originally preconceived as God. As seventh graders, they would often default to a time they interacted with a religious figure. With a little discussion, I would invite them over and over to see God in the random coincidences: an unexpected encounter with a friend, finding something they thought they lost, a warm hug from a loved one, seeing the flowers after the rain, finding money in their backpack, something that made them smile, and so on. They were the best journal entries to read and I think fondly of the discussions about all their Godincidences. Seventh graders have creative ideas about how God shows up. My hope was that one day maybe when things were stressful or they could not find the presence of anything good in their lives they might notice a shot of love from God by recognizing a Godincidence. I suppose I was shifting their attention to see from the lens of their hearts. I was inviting them to find things to be grateful for. Later in recovery, I heard people talk about the same concept but they called them God-shots. Hearing it was a Godincidence for me. All these names are made up of the same experience. It is a moment when shots of love open our eyes to allow something outside of us to remind us of the space of love within us that knows nothing else. In this uncertain and troubling time, God invites us to seek out as many God shots as we can lest we forget who we truly are.
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