dailydatewithgod

When we are young we look to our elders (parents, teachers, etc.) to provide cues as to whether how we are being is on track.  Is it what they expected?  Are we doing okay?  Do we meet with their approval?  This helps guide and shape how we behave in the world in which we survive.  Hopefully during that time we were guided by people who had enough sense of self that they didn’t work to make us who they wanted us to be but our best selves.  Some of us had that experience, others did not.  At this point, it really doesn’t matter. Many of us, myself included, simply carried out this way of being into our adulthood.  It was no longer our teachers and parents.  Instead we look to our bosses, friends, cultural norms, often still our parents to provide cues for us.  We grew up physically, but we did not mature in our sense of self.  We unfairly placed dependence on other people to tell us if we were right or wrong.  Some of us placed this person of authority inside our head and we don’t need another person because we so quickly condemn ourselves.  There is nothing wrong with this, the only question is, does it still work?  For me, I found that I was trying so hard to bend to what I “thought” other people expected of me.  I didn’t spend much time looking at what God expected of me or what I wanted to be. I “thought” to be safe and okay in this world I must play the role I have been assigned by others and just suck it up.  The only problem was that I began to slowly blot myself out in an effort to “please” everyone.  The reality of it is that I wasn’t actually “pleasing” anyone, I was simply making what I “thought” others wanted my god.  I might as well have handed them a sign. What I was missing out on was who God (not religion or society), but a loving God who created my every being wants me to be.  When I got quiet enough I discovered that God wants me to be me.  Not the me that I “think” others want me to be, but who I am from the inside out.  This meant a process of getting to know myself and stop and pause to see if who I am being and what I am doing resonates with me.  It is a journey.  A journey of growing up. It is a beautiful journey that I embark upon to the best of my ability each day. My prayer for us today is that we be willing to set aside all that we think we know about who we are and simply ask God who do you want me to be today?  Make it a great one! Peace~Colleen