I remember as a child when people in church would talk about God as if God was “up there” somewhere. I have heard people over the years talk about a bearded man in the sky. Maybe it is because I have not had the easiest time connecting to God the Father, I didn’t connect with a God “up there”. I saw the picture of the painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel and have been in many churches with high dome paintings and stain glass window depictions of God. God in a form I could relate to has always been a presence around me. My father introduced the idea to me when I was 12 of Jesus as a friend. It seemed foreign until I gave it a try. From then on, I never saw God as not being around. Clearly there were periods of my life in which I put as much distance around myself as I could, but I instinctively knew the moment I was willing to let God in closer, God was right there. In my darkest hours when I thought God was nowhere to be found, I started yelling. I remember many a conversation with God as though God was around but I couldn’t feel God’s presence. In frustration I told God I knew he/she had not abandoned me but I had no idea what I was doing to abandon God. It is curious to me even though I felt abandoned, I still spoke to God like a friend with whom I thought was right there. I have no qualms about being authentic in my expressions of anger and frustration about the status of our relationship. I didn’t scream at the sky or even have to go into church, yet I have done both of those. I sensed I just needed to share what I was feeling even in my frustration. It is a deep and abiding friendship that is around me and within me. The degree to which I remember God is as much within me as my own heart, I am able to see God around me. Sometimes it is as simple as seeing God in the very thing around me where I can’t imagine God could ever be.
Be From Around!
My prayer for us is the curiosity to notice where God is around us especially during the times when it seems as though God is nowhere to be found today.
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Be From Service!
I was raised in a Catholic household and was taught to live the principle of serving others. Getting into recovery years later I learned what being of service truly meant. The kind of service I practiced growing up was as another element of approval seeking. It wasn’t as though I didn’t genuinely want to help others but I thought I was supposed to do so in order to show God I really believed. My interpretation of the message was a little skewed. I was in such desperate need of approval, I would have used anything. I remember literally giving several sheets of paper to a fellow student who asked to borrow one because that was my way of giving my coat when asked for my shirt. I didn’t understand that being of service is two-fold. It is to be an extension and expression of love. It does not come from a place of lack or approval seeking. The point of being of service is to live out a faith in a power that provides for me and giving is my way of being the love I am at my core. Being of service I learned is not about me. It is about thought of the other. It is about seeing God in the other, not something to check off a list of being good for the day. I am able to be of service because I believe God is taking care of me and I am free to be an extension and expression of God.
My prayer for us is the willingness to show up and be an extension and expression of God’s love in service today.
Be From Independence!
I used to think that if I could just understand something or someone I would be able to accept it or them. Conversely I spent a lot of energy trying to get people to understand me in order to gain acceptance. It often felt like an uphill battle. There are many things and people I do not, nor will not ever understand no matter how hard I try. I simply cannot see things from their perspective and even if I am able to, it doesn’t always make sense to me. When I learned the principle element of acceptance my life began to change. If I wait for understanding it may never come, but if I walk in acceptance, understanding becomes independent of it. I practice acceptance and sometimes experience understanding. I do not understand why I was sexually abused by my father. As far as I can tell, abuse on any level should never be understandable. However, I have learned to accept it. It comes back to the serenity prayer. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I used this prayer as a guiding principle in my life. Serenity is the state of our being at our core. I ask God to grant me the serenity to accept that I cannot change my past. I ask God for the courage to change my present behaviors and reactions that from my adaptation to the abuse in my thinking and way of being. Lastly, I ask God for the wisdom to know when it is something I can change and something I cannot. In my thinking mind I want to understand and rationalize, but God knows the way to get me to connect to my heart and it is acceptance. I often fall for the misleading idea that if I understand something I can make it different. No amount of understanding can change my past. I walk in acceptance with God’s help one day at a time and choose to courageously live my life with the past in the past and be who I truly am at my core in the present. My heart life’s vitality allowing me to be the greatest expression of myself and see the greatest expression of others is independent of understanding.
My prayer for us is the courage to recognize the power of our independence from our mind’s need to understand to our heart’s capacity for serenity found in acceptance of what is today.
Be From Fundamentals!
There is an expression we use in training people how to use computer programs. Depending on the program there is often a lot happening on the screen. It is easy to be overwhelmed and unsure where to start or how to move from one task to another. Depending on the role of the clinician it varies. It is not eased however, by the fact that there are often multiple ways to complete a task. We refer to learning it as trying to take a sip from a water hose. They often walk out of class feeling like they have been drenched in the face, especially those who are not as comfortable around computer systems. Most of us recognize it as part of our everyday world and do not think twice. Our brains naturally weed out those which we determine we do not need to pay attention to and often we don’t even see them anymore. This is a brilliant design of our brains. If we had to take in and assess everything our eyes saw, ears heard, or skin felt we would go mad. Our brains do the dirty work of sorting things out. However, we might be missing out on something and often do if we do not wake up and decide to reassert what is fundamental to our way of being we do miss out on an opportunity to grow into our best selves. It is easy to go by our programming. But even people need an upgrade to handle the next level of challenges. We know when the newest version of the technology tools we use are coming out, but how often to we upgrade our perspective, our ideas, or our ways of being to a newer version of ourselves? The fundamental operating system stays the same for our survival. How many of know what the fundamentals of our operating system are? Our life, unlike our technology, is not just a tool. It is a mirror of how we are functioning as a whole. Our decisions and actions reveal the underlying programming from which we are working. It comes through in our language both verbally and non verbally. It conveys messages to those with whom we interact. If we want to change the output, we have to get to know the operating system. God invites me to spend time getting to know the operating system each day on our dates. I have found programs installed I had nothing to do with. I get to look at them and decide if they are in need of an upgrade. Some elements I have had for a long time and worked well, but then they become a bug in my system and stop working. Sometimes their decay causes problems with other elements of my system. They can block me from access the even deeper core of my fundamentals which is love. In those times, getting quiet and taking a non-judgmental look are helpful. God sits with me on our dates and helps me go through the process one day at a time.
My prayer for us is the courage to be willing to slow down and take a look at what elements of our operating system are functioning from the fundamentals of our deepest self today.
Be From Conviction!
The circumstances in which we find ourselves often catch us by surprise. No matter how much forethought we put into something we did not imagine it ending up like it has. Perhaps we did not take the long view or there were too many possibilities of which we could not conceive. I know I have often spent a lot of energy trying to figure it out, but it is a waste. I find that coming from a convicted place of trust in God that no matter what I am facing, I can get through. I trust it will be used to expand my capacity to love. God’s conviction about my growth in love is all that matters. I suppose it is what creates the underlying conviction that everything happens for a reason. The conviction of the presence of love in all things and all circumstances is the reason. I do not pretend to understand how or why love works but I do know it is the residing force that guides the universe. My part is to show up, be the presence of love or ready to grow in love whatever it looks like in the moment.
My prayer for us is the courage to be the presence of love in such a way we would be convicted upon trial today.
Be From Doubt!
In a world where having the answer places you on the plane of knowing and authority it is understandable that we would want to be in that category. Yet, how many things do we do each day with a certain amount of doubt? How often can we really say we know how something is going to turn out or someone is going to be? Most of our knowing is based on our belief that things will be like they were the last time. Our drive to work will be smooth because in our past experience it has been. Our time with a friend with be fraught with strife if we talk about politics because the last few times we did we were not able to agree. Our brains appreciate this type of knowing because it requires less energy output. We simply need to pull from the file in our brain and go on automatic pilot. Having doubt about something leaves room for life to unfold. Inviting God into our space of doubt allows us to proceed from wonder instead of fear. We can garner the life energy needed to be present when we doubt because the lightness of curiosity awakens in us an element of our true selves. Embracing doubt opens us up to experience more of who we are as well as learning about the world
My prayer for us is the willingness to embrace the doubt as we go into a situation or interaction and allow the light energy of curiosity guide our way to a space of knowing the moment as it unfolds today.
Be From Other!
The more closely I have gotten in my relationship with God I see the distinctions I make between me and someone else are not as bold as I once thought they were. Looking at others through the eyes of heart instead of just the eyes of my head provide an inkling of an idea of how God sees. If I truly believe God to be the Great Creator of all things, it includes other people whom I label as different. My mind is ready to evaluate what I see based on only the physical but my heart space connected to my untouched wholeness recognizes the heart of another. When I see with the eyes of my heart I realize the quality I label as other and perhaps find unlikable, is an element within me calling out to be loved. It is as though the people who embody that quality show up and I am given a chance to make peace with and treat them with love. By practicing it with others I can do so with myself. I learned early on in the 12 step path when I am bothered by something or someone, I am the one who is bothered. No one other than myself is doing anything to me. It was a completely revolutionary idea which awakened in my heart a need for greater connection to God who could show me how to see with the compassion of a generous heart. Each day on our date, God beckons me into my heart space and reminds me of the presence of other elements in me that belong there as well.
My prayer for us is the courage to see others as extensions of our being which are calling out for love today.
Be From Troubles!
Yesterday, I paused for a moment and reflected on the amount of times I have turned to God in a state of turmoil. I told myself it is a hard reality being present in the world without numbing out. I suppose I get fatigued in letting go. Yet on the other side I know from previous experience that there is at the same depth or more joy and freedom that comes from the letting go. The biggest troubles I find are the call to let go of things that I didn’t realize I was still holding on to or thought I had let go of already. They are the ones presenting themselves because of the intimacy shared with God in all these years of dating. My sense of awareness of the trouble resulting from the barriers between me and my truest self and me and my Creator. I am often baffled at how to approach my thinking and trouble with compassion but criticism and shame do not work. Those compound the troubles. So with a weary mind and a confused heart I call and reach out for God to show me how to let of the trouble of the thing or idea which is distancing me from the joy and freedom within my own heart.
My prayer for us is the courage to see our troubles as portals to our freedom and not be deceived into thinking the troubles are anything other than a call to greater love today.
Be From Attention!
Sometime it seems as though we have no control over what draws our attention. We may know what we like or don’t like but and put forth the intention to focus on one of those elements but then other things crowd into our mind. The practice of showing up for my date with God each morning has taught me that it matters less what catches my attention as it does me catching what catches my attention. I may not have control over what is calling my name or some arbitrary distraction but I can choose to catch it and take back my ability to choose whether it matches my intention. I know from experience when I make choices in alignment of my intention to bring love versus get love.
My prayer for us is the courage to utilize our ability to catch our attention and bring it back to match with our intentions today.
Be From Release!
I have a mind convinced in its almighty ability to figure things out. It is incessant and I fall for the illusion almost every time that if I think about and ponder something long enough, I will come up with a solution. On my daily dates with God I begin by writing to God and turning over the thoughts and activities for the day. It is my attempt to release that which I have planned and make room for God to come in and show me my purpose in those and perhaps unknown opportunities of the day. Releasing my ideas about anything are not easy but I have enough experience around surrender that my willingness will pop up eventually. More often than not, what I need to release is what I think about what is happening , what happened, or what may happen. The experience itself is inconsequential, the judgment I carry over myself based on how I show up for it is what dictates my presence in the moment. It is my constant prayer to be guided to release my thinking about me and everyone and everything. God, show me how you see this? God, what is your thinking on me in this moment or this situation? It is my hope that in my attempt to release, all the while not being sure I am even really surrendering, God will see the intention in my heart and receive it.
My prayer for us is the courage to be willing to consider releasing our thinking about ourselves, our actions, our ways of being and be open to the gifts of the light of God’s thinking into our minds and hearts today.
dailydatewithgod 